Erase Herゾごホ

パート2に戻る - back to you pt. II

'Won't you fall out of love?'

Such a strange time to remember such a strange question as I climbed through the wreckage of my old home, watching the sunset in the far off distance.

'Fall out of love?'

My hands trembled even as I buried them underneath my arms in an attempt to keep out the chill the night air blew by.

Would you look at me? Running across town to an old abandoned house just because someone told me to. How stupid can I be? I swallowed hard, stepping through some broken glass, the crunching underneath my heel being less than comforting.

How desperate could I be?

I'm trying so hard to confront the man who killed my mother, I'm grasping at something, at some kind of closure like hearing him tell me he did it is going to bring my mother back.

But it won't.

And now I'm so swept up in the whirlpool of it all. The secretive detective work I spent hours doing no matter how tired I was, the time I spent with Dabi. I'm so swallowed by the mass of it, swallowed and pulled so deep that if I ever do finally hear a confession from Azaziel, I won't be sure what to do with myself.

Just how far am I willing to go for something so small?

"(Y/n)."

His voice startled me for many different reasons, many reasons I couldn't exactly put my finger on. But the most prominent one was because his voice was the last I'd ever expect to hear right now while awaiting my mothers killer.

"Sho?" I whispered, turning around to see the Erasure hero standing in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest. "What're you doing here?" I asked, keeping my distance as I tugged on the edges of my school blazer. 

"I followed you here." He mumbled, his eyes no longer being able to bear the sight of me as his gaze flitted to the ground below him, "You...You lied to me. Didn't you?"

"What?" I said innocently, my idle hands fixing some loose strands of hair that blew in the night air. "What-? What are you talking about, Sho?" I stammered, already knowing his answer.

"You lied to me..." He trailed off, shoving his hands in his pockets as he leaned against the charred doorway. "You promised me, (y/n). You promised you would stop looking." His voice shook so lightly, I barely noticed the quiver in his voice til he finally glared at me from across the room, "But you never did stop, did you?" His eyes burned holes into me, those pools of darkness and numbing, that were always so oddly comforting to me, they hurt. Wrath and pain writhing around those darkened and sunken holes as his eyebrows furrowed downwards, the last glimmer of sunset flickering through his watery eyes.

I betrayed him.

My lips parted, as I tried to think up some kind of lie, any kind of sickly honey words to ease his pain. To ease the hurt I had caused, but I couldn't. I just fucking couldn't lie anymore. I didn't want to.

So I shook my head, ignoring the tears that had burned themselves in my eyes as I drew in a shaky breath, scrambling to find the words.

"I couldn't." I admitted, "You just-."

"I just what, (y/n)?" He snapped, the sound of disgust dripping from his words as he sniffled quietly, "I just 'don't understand'? Were you planning on using that bullshit line again?"