forty five

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FORTY FIVE

I SEE YOU

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I SEE YOU




His fingers twisted the rope around itself. He undid it. And twisted it again and again and again. A constant cycle of tying and untying. Each time, a different knot. It soothed him. For some reason, the small piece of rope between his fingers reminded him of his father. His father had been a brave man. A trident fisherman. His mother was potentially even braver- though he never really knew her himself. She died giving birth to his sister. He had only one sister, his grandparents were already dead when he was born and so were his aunts and uncles. For years it was just himself, his sister and his father. Then he was reaped. Just 14 years old, and he was whisked away to the Capitol. Thats where his journey to the point he's at now, began.

As he lies there, turning and turning his rope, his mind wonders to what life would have been like without the games. He would have grown up past the Reaping age. His family would never have been killed by President Snow for Finnick's initial non-compliance. His father would have grown old and died in his own bed, with Finnick at his side. His sister could have become anything she wanted to be, she was so soft and gentle and kind- too precious for the world she was born into. Finnick would have gotten the house, though there wasn't much of it. He would have taken his father's trident, the very same one he still used now, in this reality, and used it to fish. He would have done his best to help feed as many of his neighbours as possible. He probably would have never met Talia. He probably would have married another local girl, the daughter of another fisherman that knew his father. They would have had some children and lived in fear that they would be put in the games. They barely would have survived at times, going hungry some nights. He wondered what Talia's life would be like without the games. She would have been married off to someone in the District for money. Probably Jamie Kiln, her family had always been close to the Bakers. They would have never known that each other existed.

"Finnick?"

His head snaps up and his eyes take a moment to focus. Kalvin was standing in the doorway.

"Sorry, I...My mind wasn't here," Finnick says, shifting his bodyweight- spending so much time in a bed was starting to get uncomfortable.

"Thats okay, would you like to tell me what you were thinking about?" Kalvin asks, he walks over and sits down on the chair beside Finnick's bed. Finnick noticed he was holding a set of clothes- the grey overalls that everyone here wore and a pair of boots.

"I was just thinking about how different my life would have been if I was never Reaped," He shrugs, looking at the rope, "And Talia too,"

"I see...I think everyone often casts their minds to these "what if" scenarios but the only thing you have to remember is that all of this has happened for a reason. It might not feel like it right now, but it'll make sense one day," Kalvin says and Finnick nods. He didn't want to argue with him, though he knew Kalvin was probably right anyway.

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