Three is a crowd

Chapter 19

Nigel was Jade's remedy.

Whenever she was angry and she saw him her anger dissolved into nothing till now. She was tense and moody as they drove to Nigel's apartment. Nigel was quiet for the first half of the journey not wanting to intrude until the silence got to him.

"What happened baby?" he asked softly which melted away some of Jade's anger.

Nigel noticed the way she visibly relaxed and leaned her head against the headrest with her eyes closed.

"I said something really bad to Lara," Jade replied and Nigel reached for her hand.

He squeezed it reassuringly which made Jade smile wistfully.

"It couldn't be that bad," Nigel soothed and Jade shook her head no.

"It was that bad. I acted like a complete bitch and all she wanted to do was to help me. I'm so scared Nigel. What if I lose her?" Jade's voice broke along with the bridge Jade had put up to block her tears.

A lone tear escaped and Nigel longed to wipe it away but he was driving with one hand and Jade was gripping tightly on his other one.

"I don't think Lara will ever forgive me."

Nigel glanced at Jade and shook his head. "She'll forgive you. You two always work things out."

Jade nodded even though she wasn't too sure. She and Lara fought often but none of the fights had been as hurtful as this one. She had overstepped her boundaries and no one was siding with her. Nevaeh and Celia had made that clear.

After Nigel parked his car in the garage he offered to carry Jade bridal style which Jade agreed to with a bright smile.

"Am I heavy?" Jade asked wrapping her arms around Nigel.

"Not at all," Nigel replied sarcastically.

Jade swatted his back making him laugh. "You're as light as a feather."

Jade grinned at the response which made Nigel smile. Nigel put Jade on the ground after he unlocked the door and as soon as they were inside Jade turned to kiss Nigel. He kissed her back urgently pushing her gently towards the door. His hands started roaming over her body with need and urgency and Jade moaned in response to his burning touch.

That was all until someone cleared their throat and they jumped away from each other. Of all the people Jade expected to see in Nigel's apartment she had never pictured this particular person. Jade's face burned with embarrassment at being caught and annoyance at seeing Amanda in real life.

She was prettier in person but still not as pretty as Jade. Jade saw recognition flicker on Amanda's face. That meant Amanda knew about Jade, the way Jade knew about Amanda. Nigel was frozen like a deer in headlights. He was anxious and nervous, features that did not look good on him. He was also shaking with beads of sweat falling down his neck. Jade loathed him.

"So you're Jade?" Amanda asked.

Her voice was beautiful, melodic even which made Jade jealous. She hated the way she could feel it tightening against her chest making her green with envy. Jade didn't answer. She remained impassive even though the way she looked at Amanda was anything but indifferent.

Jade was looking at Amanda condescendingly, like she was the dirt under her feet. For a moment the confident demeanor Amanda was projecting wavered which made Jade smirk.

"W-what are you doing here?" Nigel stuttered and Jade felt a fresh new wave of hate for him.

"I was here to visit my boyfriend only to find him kissing another girl," Amanda said.

Jade could see Amanda's walls shake as she said the words. Jade could see the betrayal on Amanda's face, the confusion and the jealousy that Nigel went back to Jade after everything. Jade imagined how she would feel in Amanda's position. She would be crushed.

"It didn't mean anything," Nigel pleaded and Amanda started crying.

Jade remained still feeling like she was intruding. Her heart broke. So she didn't mean anything to Nigel? Jade felt like she was choking, like someone had sucked all the air out of her lungs. She wanted to cry and scream but she remained still; there but not really there.

"You slept with her didn't you?" Amanda questioned and Nigel nodded.

He didn't lie to her. Jade watched Nigel advance toward Amanda but Amanda recoiled at his touch. Jade's almost clutched her heart at the intensity of the pain as she saw the look of hurt on Nigel's face after Amanda rejected him.

"Go to hell Nigel," Amanda yelled before walking out.

Jade blinked back her tears watching Nigel collapse to the ground with his head in his hands; the perfect image of a broken man. Nigel didn't go after her; he just sat on the floor looking at the door as if that would bring Amanda back.

"I never wanted to hurt her," Nigel whispered and Jade didn't reply. "I never wanted to hurt you too."

Jade was irritated then. How dare he?

"You didn't hurt me," Jade lied and she knew the time had come.

"I'm sorry," Nigel pleaded and Jade laughed humorlessly.

"You don't have to apologize to me," Jade replied and Nigel shook his head desperately.

His eyes were now bloodshot like he had been drinking, except he was on the verge of tears.

"I ruined what we have, our relationship. I can fix it, I can fix us."

Nigel was speaking hurriedly; he didn't want Jade to leave him like Amanda had left him. He was making her his substitute over again. The realization made Jade angry.

"Our relationship?" Jade echoed calmly and Nigel nodded. "There was no relationship. You and I hung out a couple of times, that's all we ever did. I had no idea we were in a 'relationship'."

Jade's words stung both her and Nigel. Nigel looked shocked that she would say that about them and hurt. A tear escaped his eyes and Jade almost took her words back.

"I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like you were more than just a casual hookup," Jade continued before backing away.

She almost looked away, to save herself the pain of seeing her break Nigel's heart. It was what she had wanted the entire time but she didn't feel happy watching him weep. All she wanted was to hold him and say she was lying. She wanted to tell him that she loved him, she wanted to be with him and that he was never a casual hookup, he was so much more but she didn't say all that.

"Jade I love you," Nigel pleaded and Jade remained impassive.

She walked away and cried as soon as she was out of sight. She couldn't control her sobs as she collapsed on the floor just outside the elevator. Jade had never felt pain as intense as that moment realizing what she had lost. After forty five minutes of nonstop crying Jade dialed Lara's number.

Lara picked up the phone. Jade didn't say anything, she continued crying. Lara didn't say anything too which made Jade cry harder.

"I'm sorry, I am so stupid. Forgive me?" Jade cried sniffling all the while and Lara didn't reply.

"I'm coming," Lara finally said but she didn't tell Jade it was okay.

Jade knew she had messed up, big time.