Dark Knights: Knights of Ren XReader

Chapter 19: Kuruk

Kuruk POV

"No! I have to get back to her! Songbird! No!"

Kuruk thrashes in his sleep, desperate to get to her. He sprints down the hallway, mind full of her silent screams, then her peaceful acceptance of death. His breath hitches, he sprints, pulling the other Knights along with him.

He feels her presence pulling him forward to her, but it's calm and concerned. With her gentle hands on his chest, he sits bolt upright, eyes shooting open, and grips her tightly, painfully. She's okay. He whimpers and throws his body into hers, crushing their lips tightly together. He throws his arms around her in a bone crushing hug, hoping to leave no space for air, never wanting to leave her side again. His mouth opens and forces his tongue inside.

He feels her flinch under him but takes no stock in it as his hands travel over her body. Her soft skin like warm embers under his rough fingers. Electricity passes between them, and she throws her arms around his neck and melts into him. When he cups her face between his hands, she yelps into his mouth and tries to pull away. It's then that he remembers her fresh injuries, and he pulls away quickly.

"Songbird. Sorry. I-"

She interrupts, her voice acidic. "Kuruk, why do you only say sorry when you hurt me physically? But you can't say it when you hurt me emotionally?"

He looks at her, confused by the quick turn in mood, with hurt and angry eyes, making him defensive in turn.

"Like I've said, I don't have to justify my actions."

"I don't need you to justify your actions. I only need you to take accountability. Why don't you feel remorse for hurting me emotionally?"

He throws his hands up, his voice exasperated. "Because I can't see your internal wounds. You won't let me get close enough to know exactly how you feel and what your feelings mean. All I get is an impenetrable wall with small holes in it. I'm not perfect, but this isn't all about me!" his voice raises to a near shout. Their previous arguments boiling under the surface.

Her face turns red under his scrutiny, but not with embarrassment.

"I tried opening up to you, Kuruk, and you broke my trust!"

"How can I break your trust if you don't trust me to begin with. It's like you're waiting for your chance to run away."

He keeps his voice as low and calm as he can, trying his best to cover the icy feeling at admitting it. She can't deny it.

He frowns and looks down. "Did you not hear me at Jessa's? I told Master to stop, that you weren't enjoying it. I don't understand why were so mad at me after."

He hadn't been yelling over the table at his master, but surely, she could hear him trying to make him stop. The safe word did not apply to him, there wasn't much he could do. Apparently not- her face burns crimson and she cannot look him in the eyes. He sees her concentrate on something in her mind and lets her for a long moment.

He says her name, breaking her reverie. "You'll be happier if you let go. Stop feeling guilty for your thoughts. You work so hard to do the opposite of what you feel. It will tear you apart."

His heart starts to beat faster. It's the same discussion they keep having. And he's desperate for her to take him seriously.

She sighs, staring at her hands in her lap. "It feels like we have the same conversation over and over again. Neither of us will give in."

How are we always on the same wavelength, but never on the same page. He has to work to cover up a chuckle, and quickly thinks of a way to get through to her. Forcing her into situations is clearly not working. He has to get it done before tomorrow, he's close to his deadline.