After The Reasons

Ever Heard Of Morbid?

I'm officially sick of hearing my ringtone. It's the most irritating sound ever! I guess after hearing it a hundred times a day it would put you off of the sound. Screw Apple for making such an awful noise! The phone sits on the floor next to the couch I'm lying on, it's just ringing and ringing and ringing. The ringing stops for about twenty seconds then it starts from the beginning again... "FUCK OFF!" I shout, putting the cushion over my head. Unfortunately, the cushion doesn't lower the ringing, it just muffles it slightly. I can't handle this anymore! I can't turn my phone off incase Jessica calls to tell me somebody else has arrived, but I can't bear to listen to the phone ring anymore. I  grab the phone, end the call from Heidi, and power the phone off completely. "Silence..." I say satisfied, dropping the phone back to the floor where it sits silently. It's weird, this room, I barely ever sat on this couch when Justin and I lived here. I remember sitting here a few times with him playing video games, but we never really sat here. "So you're hiding from a girl?" I lift my head and see Justin sitting at the opposite end of the sofa. "I'm not hiding from her!" I exclaim. He nods his head, "You're hiding from a girl!" He laughs. The thing is, I am hiding. But he doesn't get to point that out! "Shut up, Justin!" He laughs more. I roll my eyes and he throws my feet off of the sofa and sits down next to me. "Why are you sitting here? We never sit here." Justin asks. "Because when Zach, Alex, Charlie and Jessica were here, they were on my bed and the chairs... so I came and sat here. I was comfy so I just stayed here when they left." I explain. He squints his face, "Clay, you've been on this couch for three hours. You've lay here for three hours, listening to that fucking phone ring." He says. Three hours? I thought it had only been like forty minutes. "Three hours?! What time is it?" I ask surprised. A concerned look washes across Justin's face, narrowing his eyes. "Dude, are you good?" I throw my head back onto the back of the sofa, and sigh. "I'm fine. I think. It's this fucking town, Justin! It messes with you!" Crestmont gets to your head, even when you don't realise it. You can be here years and never notice how much this place fucks with your head, then by the time you do notice... it's too late! "Trust me, I get it. I'm trapped in this town... I can't leave." He says sheepishly. Wait, Justin can't leave Crestmont? "What?" I ask. "I've not left this shit hole of a town. When you're dead it's... complicated." He vaguely explains. "But you're just a hallucination. Like a figment of my imagination. Aren't you?" I ask. I'm so confused, I thought Justin was just my subconscious telling me I need him. "Look, it's complicated. I can't tell you right now, but one day I'll be able to. But that day isn't today, Clay." He says in a serious voice. I nod, "okay." Justin nods back then faces the TV that is in front of the sofa, with this index finger tracing his bottom lip and his left leg bouncing up and down. I don't know what to say, if he's trapped in Crestmont... that changes everything for me. I can't leave this town if Justin is trapped here, I won't leave my brother behind. "Could you imagine staying in this town your entire life?" A familiar female voice asks, I know exactly who that is. I turn around, looking behind the couch and I see Hannah standing there in the same outfit she had on earlier.  "It's a depressing thought." Justin says. "Wait, you two can see each other?" I ask looking between them both, shocked. Hannah and Justin both laugh, they laugh as if I'd said the dumbest thing ever. Hannah walks around the couch, sitting down on the table in between the sofa and TV. "Obviously, dumb ass!" Justin says still laughing, looking at Hannah and then to me. "So, Clay, how is Crestmont, Evergreen County treating you this time round?" Hannah asks, tucking her long hair behind her ears. "How do you think? It's fucking Evergreen County! This place is toxic!" I state. Hannah raises her eyebrows then looks down to her feet. "Tell me about it." She says. "How did we end up dead?" Justin asks. Morbid cunt. Who the fuck is able to say that? This is just weird. "Like, out of everyone in Crestmont, how did Hannah Baker and Justin Foley end up dead?" He continues. Why does he have a smile on his face? "Because we had the best intentions, the purest souls... and we fucked up. I'm dead because I couldn't handle the pain anymore. Everyone I knew was hurting me and leaving me, so I decided to leave. For good. You're dead because all you wanted was to be good. You wanted to succeed and be great, but your mom let you down. Then you were homeless, shooting heroin in an ally in Oakland, sending postcards to the girl who left you after you let your best friend rape her. You thought you'd been saved... when the Jensen's came along and they wanted you. You thought you had been saved from the hurricane that was your future. But your past still caught up with you, and now you're dead. We both are." Hannah explains while looking blankly at the wall. "You're right morbid bastards!" I say, with my face screwed up. "You didn't deserve to die, Hannah. You shouldn't have went through the shit that you did... the shit that I started. If it weren't for that picture, you'd probably still be here. It's my fault you're dead." Justin says with a poker face. What the fuck is going on in my room right now? I feel uncomfortable. "Me on the other hand, I was doomed from day one. My dad walked out, my mom was a junkie who loved abusive guys, I was best friends with a fucking rapist and then I was homeless, having sex with randoms so I could buy essentials and heroin. I was doomed all along, but you weren't, Baker. You were promising." He continues. "Is this the part where you two kiss and run off into the sunset together?" I ask sarcastically. They both turn their heads towards me, with a disgusted look in their faces. "I'm sorry." I murmur. Hannah rolls her eyes and Justin punches me in the arm. "Ouch!" Hannah giggles and Justin rolls his eyes. "Oh Helmet, you just don't know when to stop... do you?"