𝕃𝕖𝕘𝕒𝕔𝕪 - 𝔸 𝕊𝕋𝔸ℝ𝕎𝔸ℝ𝕊 𝕊𝕋𝕆ℝ𝕐

15 - NO ONES EVER REALLY GONE

(Song: To Build A Home - The Cinematic Orchestra)

Mae wakes up back on the Resistance ship. A cup of water is beside her and Ahsoka's cloak is laid over her.  Ahsoka is gone. She doesn't want to think about it. She has to be strong. She has to keep telling herself that everything is going to be okay. She takes a sip of the water. Throwing her legs over the side of the bed she looks down and sees Caleb sleeping on the floor with a blanket. He's never done this before. He usually just stands in the doorway awkwardly when he wants to talk to her. He probably just passed out after carrying her inside. She takes a look at him and brushes his hair away from his face. It looked better down than when he combed it back. She smiles a little at him. She hated him for so long and now he might be the only person she isn't mad at. No matter how annoying she thought he could be, how many arguments they got into, he would show up when she needed him. No, Mae thought to herself, her smile dropped. I'm a danger to him, to everyone. Mae walks towards the mirror quietly and looks down to see what she was wearing, it wasn't her black outfit or her normal green jumpsuit. She was in her bra and some sweat pants. Her face looks back at Caleb. She would have woken Caleb up to beat him up but she realized why. She had a large bandage wrapped around her side/back from the burn from Kylo's lightsaber. It hurt like a bitch. She proceeded to do the most difficult task of her entire life and put on a shirt. She almost opened her wound again and had to bite her tongue not to yelp and wake Caleb. She put it on halfway with only one arm in and thought that was good enough. She would need Caleb's help, but she was too prideful to ask. So instead she took a good look at herself in the mirror. Her hair was taken out of her braid. Tears had stained her face and her eyes were red and puffy. She quietly took a washcloth and wiped her face, a poor attempt to look presentable. She stood there for a moment.

Was this all her fault? 

She felt like punching the glass and shattering the mirror in front of her. She walked towards the door. Her hand touched the nob and she hesitated. She looked at Caleb again. Oh, how she longed to just stay there in bed, maybe even with him. She opens the door and walks down the hall. She had to talk to Leia, she sensed her and knew she was awake.

She walks up to the door of the meeting room. Before she reaches the door, Uncle Han slams the door open, he's leaving Leia. He stops in his path before running over Mae. She hadn't seen her uncle for a while. Mae used to see him lots with Aunt Leia when she was a kid. Then after Mae and Ben moved to the temple she never saw him again and she didn't know why. Maybe it was because Han didn't agree with Ben being sent to the temple, who knew. This was the first time in 10 months since he's been at the Resistance.

"Hey, kid. You alright?" He says slightly off guard, putting his hand on her shoulder. She feels guilt and anger at him. He looks at her bandage wraps, they needed to be changed.

"I'm fine Uncle Han. I promise." She whispers, forcing a smile, and covering her side with her arm, not wanting him to look for too long at the damage Ben had caused her. She doesn't want him to feel more guilty. "Can I talk to Auntie Leia for a moment?" Mae asks.

"Yeah, of course, I was leaving." He took his hand off her shoulder. He meant permanently leaving again. That made Mae sad, but she understood he wanted to run away. She wanted to do the same most days. Being a part of this family was hard.

"Say hi to Uncle Chewy for me. I've missed him." She smiled sadly at him as she turned to Leia's door. As Mae passes him and steps into the room, Han slightly murmurs under his breath, "I'm sorry." Mae wasn't sure if it was meant just for her.

Mae spots Leia with her hand touching her forehead in stress. Leia's back is turned to the door. They must have been arguing.

"Auntie, are you alright?" Leia turns to look at Mae.