Chapter 9

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HELLO HELLO HELLO BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE! I'M BACK WITH ANOTHER CHAPTER!!!

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I rushed in the house, my newly cut hair and done nails forgotten. Deacon stood just inside, tapping his foot and looking at his watch. As soon as I stepped into the house, his eyes darted towards me. He looked me up and down, analyzing every inch of me, and I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. After a minute of this, he nodded his approval.

"Go get dressed." I nodded in acknowledgment. I started towards my room, but he stopped me. "Oh, Mr. Marshall said that he wanted you to wear his shirt." Deacon rolled his eyes and handed me a large black t-shirt, an exact replica of the one Silas had already left with me- the one I was currently wearing.

I gripped the smooth material in my fingers before nodding again and scurrying off to my room. As soon as I closed my door, I leaned against it, the back of my head hitting the wood. Feeling the urge to puke, I closed my eyes and tried to swallow back the rising bile. 

When I opened my eyes, I knew that I needed to start getting ready or Deacon would not be pleased with me. I gently set the shirt down on the corner of the bed before heading towards the bathroom. I grabbed my limited makeup supply out from under the counter, applying mascara, lip gloss, and a little bit of foundation in the rough-looking spots. Checking my face to make sure that I had everything covered, I shoved the makeup back into my bag and under the sink. I ran a brush through my hair to get out all the knots.

I scurried back to my room, trying to do everything as quickly as possible to not upset Deacon, or Silas. I slid my sweatshirt over my head to reveal Silas' other black shirt. I glanced back and forth between the shirt lying on my bed and the one I had on. There didn't seem to be a difference between the two, but I chose to put on the new shirt. Lifting up the mattress, I hid the old black tee from sight. 

Even though I knew he didn't care about me, a small part of me wanted to keep Silas's first shirt a secret from Deacon and his men. I just wanted to have a little part of my life that they didn't know about, that they couldn't control. 

I quickly realized how foolish it was. Nothing in my life was in my control, and I knew Silas never cared about me no matter how nice he could be. I didn't deserve for someone to care about me anyway.

I realized that I needed to put on bottoms, and then I also remembered I was on my period and cringed. I raced back to the bathroom and rummaged around under the sink until I found what I was looking for. I held it in my hand and contemplated my decision. I wasn't sure what to do, whether I should leave in my tampon or take it out and use a pad. My body started to shake from nerves, and I knew that if I kept going back and forth, I would probably pass out or throw up. Or both. Before either of those happened, I decided to change into a pad. I pulled on a pair of looser shorts that were still short enough to hide under the oversized shirt I had on. 

Shuffling out of the room, I saw Deacon standing just outside of my bedroom, obviously waiting for me to finish getting ready. He grunted, and I took that as his approval of how I looked. He gestured with a nod of his head towards the right.

"Go. He's in the pool house waiting for you." As I shuffled past him, I felt a hand slap my bottom, leaving a stinging sensation in its place. I grimaced, hoping he didn't see. I continued on my way through the back door.

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