I'm Blind Not Fragile

Chapter 16

After my father stormed out I lay on the floor, stunned. Silent tears wet my face and couldn't stop them. The time finally came when my voice came back to me, but the sounds that came out of me were inhuman. The pain was bearable, but I could feel my heartbeat in every limb on my body. As if my stomach when I was kicked has become my heart and instead of pumping blood it was pumping pain through my body. When Brandon and I would spar it never got to the point of me being in actual searing pain. The ache from my abdomen wasn't the only thing pinning me to the floor though. The thought that my father did this to me, that he would come after me physically. Howard has always been into emotional torment rather than actually attacking someone. So why am I the exception? Why can't he just love me for me? My tears were a mix of pain and a mix of mourning the father I could have had.

I don't know how long I laid on the floor, just that when I finally built up enough force to push myself up my tear had long since dried. After a lot of breaks and a few gasping for air moments, I manage to get into a standing position. I knew bruises littered my stomach. Brandon always said I bruise easily, but I've never had the pleasure of seeing the broken blood cells just below my skin that form bruises. Every step sent a new ache into my abdomen. The pain was localized around the right side of my body and that made walking pretty difficult. I imagined my pain in my mind and tucked into a small box, which I then closed and locked. I pushed my pain so far down that I could ignore it while I figured out what to do. Training with Brandon had resulted in quite a few tricks for pushing through pain. In a fight, when you get hurt you cant always tap out. If the fight Is serious then you need to be able to keep going. Similarly, if you're hurt in an unfamiliar place its best not to let your guard down.

I walk around the room first feeling for alternative exits. Running my hand along the wall I feel the locked door that I came in through. Continuing around I found what was probably a closet and the bathroom. I walked around the bathroom and got familiar with everything through touch. Once I exited the bathroom I found the window. When I opened in a cool breeze rushed through the room. The air outside was not exactly warm, but that neutral temperature of late September with that subtle threat of cooler October air. I found an extra roll of toilet paper in the bathroom and dropped it out of the rainbow. It took much to long to hit the ground. And I knew there was no escaping through the window. What good would it do anyway? I hardly even knew where I was.

The door on the other side of the room unlocked. I rushed myself to a wall where nobody could sneak up behind me. If my father came back for round 2, I wouldn't be so shocked to fight back. Not this time. The footsteps that came into the room were much too light to be Howard though. If I wasn't listening very hard I might not have heard them at all. Soft feet padded into the room.

"Hello Ms. Lewis, I'm here with your night clothes. Sorry to disturb you but I imagine your evening dress is getting a bit uncomfortable." A younger soprano voice says as she makes her way over to me. I was impressed by how softly she moved. Like she was floating over the tile and gravity held no bound on her. "My name is Juniper. I'm the maid assigned to your well being while you are in this manor."

I scoffed, "My wellbeing?" I couldn't help but think back to what happened to me earlier. "I'm not safe here."

"Nobody is safe here Hun. There are not many people in this house that want to be here." She said, making me wonder what exactly is keeping her here.

"Can you help me leave? My brother will be worried about why I'm not home yet. He is very protective of me." I plead to try to make it clear that someone will realize I'm missing.

"Your brother believes that you are spending quality time with your father. He has been told that you and Howard are trying to patch your relationship back together one step at a time. Your school believes that your family is on vacation. There is nobody wondering where you are. That is just how things are. Now let's get you out of that dress." Her explanation stuns me. There is no one looking for me. Normally Brandon would start looking for me, but he no longer has to be my friend so I'm on my own.

Juniper came behind me and I'm sure was about to undo my dress when I briskly walked away from her. This was so weird! I wasn't about to let some woman (who sounded like she was only a couple years older than me) undress me. I don't need help getting dressed and undressed. Besides, I don't even have any clothes to change into! If I get the chance I'm going to kill Howard.

Juniper made the connection that I wasn't going to let her undress me. "Sorry about that. Normally when I'm assigned to take care of someone it involves helping them dress and undress. I understand that you probably don't want a stranger to undress you. Heaven knows I wouldn't want that. I'm going to put the nightgown on the bed and you can change yourself." She did just that and I listened intently as she walked across the room. Her feet gliding along the floor, and her clothes occasionally rustling. It was strange how quietly she traveled. She finally walked out of the door, locking it behind her, and left me in peace.

I'll admit getting out of that dress was a little difficult. I had Brandon help me out of the zipper last time, and it took me a couple of tries before I finally got a good grip on the little piece of metal in the middle of my back. Honestly, why are dresses designed like this? I rolled my eyes when I felt the stupid nightgown. Silk? Seriously? What's wrong with some random shorts and an old t-shirt?

Once I was dressed I took a moment to just standstill. Although my abdomen had turned into a painful dull ache, pulling on the stupid dress hurt more than I expected it to. My door opened suddenly and I was sure it was Howard coming in to let out his frustration. But junipers soft footsteps helped me relax at once. Juniper had yet to do anything threatening towards me and I believe even in my injured state I could probably overpower the girl.

"Hey Gertrude, I figured you'd be done changing by now. I came back because you're definitely going to need help with that hair. Honestly how long did that take?"

"Only about 3 hours," I said shuddering at the experience. She changed the topic so quickly that I didn't even correct her about my name. Juniper lead me to a chair that I had noticed in my sweep earlier. I sat down while she nimbly undid the intricate hairstyle in my hair. She pulled pin after pin out of my hair while I sat still. Juniper's fingers were small and easily undid my hair. With such small fingers and soft footsteps, she must be very petite. She is only maybe a little taller than my height and I can only assume she is in her early 20's.

"Alrighty, that should do it," Juniper announced after she brushed out my hair. I stood up and she guided me to the very squishy bed. Everything was so over the top, it made me uncomfortable. I'm just a normal girl, not a freaking princess! I laid down on my back and once my body stilled, I knew that the adrenaline was leaving my body the more I relaxed and the pain came back bit by bit until it all came back at once.

Juniper moved beside me before warning me,

"Gertrude, prepare yourself this is going to be cold and uncomfortable but ice packs should make your bruises feel better and go away faster." She places ice packs around my right side, the cold slowly came through the blanket between my skin and the ice but soon the numbness helped the pain seep away.

Juniper left my room and locked the door behind her. Orders from my father no doubt. And I found myself wondering yet again, what is forcing her to stay here?