Through highs & lows

Through Highs & lows: chapter 53

I walk out of the hospital with the intentions of going to my car, before realizing I came with Colby. I hear Colby behind me, but I don't answer, I don't even turn around, instead I start walking down tye sidewalk. He eventually catches up to me though. "What do you want?" I snap. "I want to comfort you. I want for you to be okay." He says. "Well I'm not so just stop trying. Give up already. I'm not worth it. Your driving down a dead end." I cry. Colby grabs my hand. "No I'm not. I understand that your upset or hurt, but I love you. Please just listen. I won't let you go." He say. "No you don't understand Colby. You don't know me like you claim to. I'm not a kind, sweet, whatever person. My dad is in a hospital and I just told my mom that if he dies I'll blame it on her for the rest of my life. I feel bad, but I meant it, and I still do. Colby you love the wrong person. I'm gonna hurt you one day. Please. I don't want to, so let go of me. Your gonna make the pain of leaving hurt more than it has too." I beg, before letting go of his hand. "Stop that!" He yells, finally snapping. "Stop saying that. There's not gonna be an end. I'm not gonna ever leave you. Your not broken, your loved. I love you and I know you love me, so stop acting like you don't." He says, taking heavy breaths and letting tears stream down his face. I just stand there crying. He looks at me and pulls me against him. I don't pull away, just stand there crying into him, knowing I don't deserve his love. I'm not afraid of him hurting me, I'm afraid of hurting him. I don't say anything though. I won't push him away. I don't want to. "Colby she wasn't even even crying." I say. He pulls away and looks at me kind of confused. "My mom. I told her that my dad could die, and she didn't even cry. Her voice cracked and that was it." I say. "She just wants to be strong for you." Colby says. "It's not about me. It's about loving someone. They've been married for what twenty, twenty-two years. Colby we've been dating for a week. I've loved you like this for only like two and a half years maybe. If that was you on the bed, I'd still be crying just as much as now. I may even cry more. Your the love of my life. He's the love of her life. How can she not shed a single tear. If that was me..." I take in short breaths as more tears fall. "If that was me. Would she not cry. Would she not care?" I cry. "I don't know. I'm sure there's a reason. I'm sure she would. There's more to it." Colby says. "What more could there be?" I ask. "I don't know?" He says. "There's nothing more that's why." I say, now angry with her. I hear someone call out my name. It's my mom. "Talk to her." Colby says. "No." I say grabbing his hand and pulling him back. "I don't want to." I say. "Baby. You have to. I'm not going anywhere. I'll be in the hospital waiting." Colby says, kissing my cheek. He leaves as my mom approaches me. God he's the worst best thing I've ever had. "Caroline..." My mom, says as she stands in front of me. "What?" I say, clearly not in the mood to talk. "Listen. I understand your upset and going through a lot, but..." "Mom I love you. I really do, but I meant what I said. In fact it looks like your even further from crying now, so just go." I say crossing my arms. "Will you just listen to me." She says. "No. I won't listen, because the fact that my dad could be on his death bed and your not even crying. There's not much you could say. What if that was me. Would you just stand there with a stone cold look on your face. I mean surely you've 'loved' him longer than me right? Honestly why are you even here?" I say. "Stop it don't say that. Don't act like I don't love you or your father, because I love you both. And if I didn't love him. I wouldn't be here. I'm the one who stuck by his side, through everything." She says. "That's what your supposed to do. Your his wife." I say. "And I have because I love him Caroline. I've never once left his side because I love him. Even after he cheated. Continuously." She says, finally letting tears fall down her face. "He what?" I cry, in disbelief.