Through highs & lows

Through Highs & lows: chapter 11 (Colby's p.o.v.)

The door opens to a smiling Caroline, but it starts to fade I think as she sees me. It reappears in an instant, but didn't feel as real. "Hey. I got the papers and stuff it was just syllabus'  You didn't miss anything. Oh except in sixth period they just explained the merge with band and choir, but there was no syllabus or anything, since it's a returning class." I smile and hands her the papers. "Thank you." She almost chokes on. "Hey are you okay." I say worried. "Yeah, the headache is just back or something. I should go." She says starting to close the door, but I stop it. "Caroline your lying. It's not a headache. I can see the feeling of pain. You haven't even touched your head. What's wrong. Why won't you tell me." I almost beg, worried about her. "I'm sorry. You can come in." She says stepping aside for me to walk in. She looks moments away from tears and I still don't know why. "You don't have to say anything. It doesn't matter. I'm here." I say pulling her into a tight hug. She hugs me back and I feel her cry into my chest. I just stand there rubbing her back, comforting her, and ready to talk when she was, even if it didn't happen anytime soon. "I love you." Caroline says in tears looking at me. My heart skipped a beat when I heard that, maybe because it caught me off guard, but it felt different, it felt like it meant something more. Like not just as a friend. Like I'll love you now and forever. Maybe it's all in my head though. Maybe I'm just hearing, what I want to hear. "I love you too Caroline. I really do." I whisper, trying to draw her even closer to me. After a while she pulls away. "Um thank you for stopping bye." She says. "That's it?" I ask. "What else is there." She says looking down. "What do you mean. Why have you been avoiding eye contact. Why where your crying. Just tell me." I beg. Oh my god it started when I told her about Ariana. I saw it for a split moment. I saw the hurt. I thought it was just me. Maybe I'm not in my head. Honestly I don't even like Ariana that much, sure she's nice, but deep down I wanted Caroline to tell me that it was a bad idea. I wanted her to tell me, she didn't have anybody to go with, or that she didn't want to go with anybody, but me. I hoped she had told me that she felt the same way as me, because I've felt it forever now and I'm tired of not knowing. I don't know what's in my head anymore and what's not. I just know that I love Caroline, and I don't know how to say it. "Caroline?" I ask. "Yeah?" "Did you get jealous when I told you about Ariana. Is that why you've been kind of dodgy?" I ask, needing the truth. "No." She says still avoiding eye contact. "Stop that. Stop lying to me like I to stupid to stupid to notice. Please Caroline. Look me in the eyes and tell me." She looks up as a tear stream down her face, but she wipes it away. "Colby I don't care if you go with Ariana. I wanted to go with Dylan anyways. I didn't know how'd you feel about it?" She says looking me dead in the eyes. I feel my heart almost shatter inside. "Yeah of course I'm sorry. I just didn't want it to be awkward, since were nothing more than friends. I'll go now." I say, starting for the door. "Waite Colby." She says standing in front of the door, before I can get to it. "Yeah?" I ask, hoping she was lying. "I don't want you to leave." She says. Not what I was hoping, but still something I needed to hear. "Yeah of course." I sigh. "Thank you." She whispers. "Of course I'll stay. That's what friends are for." It hurts saying that, but it was the truth. Maybe that's all we'll ever be, but better than losing her I guess. "Come on let's watch a movie." I say walking to the living room. "Okay." She just nodding her head. "Colby?" She says stopping. "Huh?" I ask. "If we're still just friends, then why does it feel like this?" She asks. "Id don't know. You tell me." I say getting slightly irritated. "Well. Now what, this isn't normal." She says. "That's because you keep lying." I say aggravated. "Why are you being so cold. I'm not lying." She says. "That doesn't help." I say before just leaving out to my car.