The Boy I Shouldn't Want to Love

15. Ruining everything

"Are you in love with me?"

Something in Liam's brain died away. He couldn't have heard right. Theo couldn't really have asked such a thing

"W-what?" He rasped, immediately feeling embarrassed at how his voice sounded ridiculously high-pitched, blowing an astounded laugh. It had to be a joke. But as Theo took a step toward him, letting go of his hand, there was no trace of fun on his face. Actually Liam didn't think he'd ever seen him so serious.

"You heard me right, Li" he said firmly, never taking his eyes off his, while Liam did everything he could to avoid them, his eyes darting everywhere.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about ..." he stammered. God, why was he trembling? His heart was beating panicked against his rib cage, and he felt his whole body stretched under the weight of the anxiety that flowed inside him clouding his mind.

This was not supposed to happen. It was assumed that they should never talk about it. Why Theo had to bring it up? Why right now?

"I-" He stepped back nervous, but Theo quickly grabbed him by a sleeve as if he feared he might escape. "Damn, Li, just answer the fucking question!" He shouted.

Liam gave a start, noticing out of the corner of his eyes a group of boys watching them confused as they passed them by. "Are they bickering?" He heard someone murmur, followed by giggles. He blushed even more, the fear rising to the idea that someone who knew them could see them now. "Theo .." he just said, his voice low and pleading, trying to free himself from Theo's grip on his sleeve.

Theo ignored him "Liam, just-" He pulled him even closer to the point that they were almost touching now. And there something in Liam's mind snapped. Why was Theo doing this to him ?!

"Let me go!" He snapped and tugged his arm hard . Probably Theo did not expect such a sharp reaction, that's why when Liam pushed him away, stumbled back then ending up falling to the ground.

Liam didn't even stop to look, at that moment he just wanted to run away. And that was what he did.

"Liam!" Theo tried to call him as he sat up. But by now the other was already gone. Theo cursed, dropping his head on his hands. He expected that it would go bad, but certainly not so bad. Anyway, he wouldn't chase Liam all over Beacon Hills, surely. Meanwhile he already knew that sooner or later he would have to go back home.

*

Liam didn't stop to think about it. In fact he was absolutely not thinking of anything, while by instinct he was running away towards home. His mind was blank, only his heavy breathing and the sound of his steps as a company as he ran through the dark and deserted streets.

Only when he was in his room and locked the door behind him, he let reality reach him. He gasped to catch his breath, cold sweat pouring down his forehead as he leaned it against the wood of the door, before turning around, sliding against it until he sat on the floor, hiding his head between his knees against his chest.

What had he just done? He had ruined everything. Theo had figured everything out, and had asked him one, simple and straight question, and he had escaped. He had pushed him away, literally this time, and ran away again . He had left Theo alone in the middle of a dark street, although he knew what a bad time the other boy was facing lately. But he couldn't, he couldn't honestly answer that question without compromising everything he - they - his mother, Paul ... were hardly and slowly building up. Just one simple yes would have ruined everything. Is it possible that Theo didn't care?