Sin For Me (bxb)

Pillow Talk

Thomas

I redressed and pulled us back into our room. Damian's neck was littered with red blotches, so I assumed mine was too and pulled up my shirts collar in attempt to cover them.

I felt sick, gross, used, like I always did after something like this happened, but nonetheless I would probably be on my knees for him in a day.

"We will have to go clean up the mess in the garden soon," I told him, running cold water through my fingers to press to my face and neck.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll do it after a nap, but I was serious."

"About?"

"Us talking! We can't just tiptoe around the subject until we end up fighting again.

"Ok, say what you want."

"You... I- Ugh I dont know! You're supposed to be apologizing for splitting open my lip!"

"You gave me a bruise on my cheek, why should I be the one apologizing?"

"Oh my god, ok so let me get this straight, you'll use me for your bicurious fantasy and treat my like shit otherwise?"

I rolled my eyes, "Listen to yourself! What do you expect Damian?"

"Jesus fucking christ... you're psychotic and I'm done, I'm done with you." He left the room, slamming the door, muttering obscenity after obscenity.

What does he expect from me? I am to be a priest some day, and this was wrong to begin with... perhaps the best move was to end it now before it went too far.

The door reopened with another slam as he grabbed me and through me up against the wall, the shock of it all making me gasp.

"You know..." he spat, holding my collar, "I really thought... I really- fuck you... fuck you Thomas. I'm a person too, not just a fucktoy and definitely not some lost soul for you to fix with Jesus."

"Get away from me." I sneered, teeth bared.

"Gladly." He let go and re-left the room. I didn't even notice he had taken his things with him, just saw his presence disappear.

No, no, no, no! I was supposed to have control. I was supposed to be able to keep him under control.

My hand twitched, and all I could feel was the slap I gave him his first week here. How his cheek felt under my skin. How the sting made my palm red. I didn't realize how much his words felt like a slap.