Always Love

Chapter 21: Always Be The One

Noah

I have been in America for a week now. The last months in Brazil weren't that spectacular. I mean don't get me wrong, Rio De Jeneiro is probably the most amazing city I have ever been to. I published a couple of short stories and I made great experiences, but my restless soul couldn't calm down. I guess Emma was right ... I won't find my inner peace in any of those cities. However, even admitting this feels like someone has just thrown me under a bus.

Ethan and Emily's wedding is this weekend. When I think about it, I have mixed feelings. On the one side, I feel so happy for Emily and Ethan and I admire them so much that even when they had been through hell, they made it out of it ... together. On the other side, I don't want to see Emma and her new boyfriend living the life we were supposed to have. Well, she deserves to get all the happiness one person can receive, but I don't want or can't see her in the arms of another man. I lied to her back then. Of course I cared that she spent her birthday with this Christian guy. Of course I would have cared, if she had spent every day of the week with another man. I acted like a complete idiot and pushed her away so often; even when I needed her most. She will always be the one for me and I really wish that I could turn back time. But let's face it, I can't give her the love that she deserves.

Okay enough. I will leave for Spain next week. The Pompeu Fabra University offered me a great job. I think it is also high time to finally leave Yale and America behind me. I don't wanna tell anyone before Christmas, because that would only cause huge drama. But I can't keep coming back again and again. I need to settle down somewhere ... maybe Spain will release my wandering soul.

All I Want (Today Live FM version) - Kodaline

No Right To Love You - Rhys Lewis

Hold On (Acoustic) - Chord Overstreet