Day 38

28 6 13
                                    

Thursday, May 14, 2020

~~~

I think I cracked the code.

So basically me and my friend were talking via text and I think it was about a head canon she had over some characters and I accepted 100% and anyway I somehow got us onto the topic of how humans have almost zero control over our lives.

Yeah.... this happens a lot.... anyways....

I had a really good rant I'll insert later when I can screenshot the conversation, but basically it went like this:

We as humans have no control over our lives at all. We could die AT ANY TIME or go bankrupt or get seriously injured or chronically ill or lose everything or say one wrong thing and lose everyone we've ever known.

And as an ace person, it really scares me because I know how most people place a lot of their emotional attachment to their significant others, but (and this is just for me) I place more of my emotional attachment and connection in platonic relationships and hobbies/activities and books/stories because that's what's important to me. And the idea that I could lose it all at any moment scares me to no end because that's all my emotional attachments and connections. That is my everything. And I could lose it at any time, either because of me or something out f my control or a mix of both... Literally everything I've ever known and loved could be taken away in a snap and... I just don't know if I could take that.

Also also, that supports a theory I have! My theory is that many humans seek to have power/be in seats of power because they need to feel that they are in control of something when they can't really control much in their lives. 

It's a reoccurring theme of human history: someone wants power and figures out a way to get it, and then either uses it for good, bad, or moral grey because they need to have control over things. Why do you think villains and rulers always have such a need to be the leader, the one calling the shots, the one deciding who lives and who dies? It's because of a need to be in control of something in a life where we hold so little control over. 

I'm not saying we're all bloodthirsty for control or that control is bad, not at all! Control is good in moderation, if you don't have a single choice over your life or in day to day events of your life, that isn't good. I'll admit I have issues with control because I feel like I don't have control a lot so I do things in a way that prove to myself that I make my own choices and I have control over my life, not always in the healthiest ways.

So yeah, there's that. 

I may use this argument in an English paper someday, I feel like that'd be a good thesis or something.


Stay safe kiddos!! Make sure to drink plenty of water!

I love you all <3<3

~Ink

Late Night ThoughtsWhere stories live. Discover now