Waiting | Ateez Seonghwa x reader

5 ~ Heartstrings

You looked at the sight in front of you with pure distaste. You chugged the drink in your hands while you felt a bitter feeling rise in your chest.

Seonghwa was talking to yeonsoo and he smiled happily, yeonsoo had greeted you earlier when you were with yunho and you simply smiled at the girl making small talk. Then a while after seonghwa had arrived.

But as soon as he saw yeonsoo he had told you to wait for him, He said he would just greet her and he would be back to you soon. But as an hour passed you went to find him and now you were staring at the two. 

You crunched the empty plastic cup in your hands in frustration and you went to get another drink, then another, then another. 

Soon your balance was off and you knew you probably looked like an idiot walking through the crowd of sweaty dancing people as you stumbled looking for yunho or san. You hoped seeing your friends would help to distract you from the fact that seonghwa once again left you for yeonsoo.

You stumbled through the crowd as you gulped down the contents of another drink you got and you soon felt a hand on your waist as you almost fell down, the familiar blazing red haired male held you up

He said something but you hardly heard him as you slurred out "I'm walking" you said simply not being able to quite voice that you were trying to currently find your friends. Hongjoong, you remembered his name, he gently held your waist and you simply followed him until the door to the small house appeared.

He opened it and the night breeze hit your warm face, you sighed in relief while you stumbled outside with hongjoong still holding you up and you sat on the side of the street. You saw a few people outside the house, some stumbling down the street to attempt to walk home with friends and others puking. That wasn't so pleasant to watch.

"you alright, you look a little..." hongjoong spoke while you slurred "drunk, yeah I am. I'm a mess" you said knowing full well that the many drinks had gotten to you.

Hongjoong laughed at how self aware you were "should I call you a cab" he asked and you furrowed your eyebrows

"NO" you screamed out while hongjoong jumped slightly at the sound of your voice. You then looked down as you stared at the street while the cool breeze attempted to sooth your drunk soul as you remembered seonghwas words

"wait right here y/n, I'm just going to say hi to yeonsoo and then I will be right back"

You raised your finger and you pointed it to the spot on the ground where you sat "wait...I have to wait right here" you said while hongjoong simply tried to hold in his laugh seeing how drunk you were.

You fumbled to get up but hongjoong gently grabbed your arm and pulled slightly so you flopped back down and sat on the street side next to him again "alright I get it, you can wait right here" he said while you simply sat quietly until the alcohol took over your speech

"wait...I'm always waiting here" you croaked out, you really did blame it on the alcohol... why you got so emotional. But in reality you knew the emotions you kept bottled up were just resurfacing, the ones you kept deep down inside yourself began floating to the surface as the alcohol inside you raged

You stared at the ground not looking up at the red head beside you as you spoke again "I hate this, I hate crowded parties. There is nothing good about a bunch of students crammed into a small house as the music slowly makes you want to cover your ears. There is nothing good about being in a room full of people when you could be relaxing at home with close friends...where she isn't" you slurred your words out while you thought about the girl, the perfect yeonsoo.

"there is nothing good about buying a new outfit that you think will make people look at you differently, that maybe they would look at you in the way you wanted, as more than a friend. There is nothing good about being pushed to the side over and over again having to wait...there is nothing good about parties" you felt tears well up in your eyes.

You knew you had far passed the topic of parties, you knew you had moved onto the other feelings you kept hidden, the frustration, the anger...the heartbreak.

You felt something being draped over your shoulders and you noticed a jacket was placed over you as you heard a soft voice "yeah...parties really do suck don't they. I'm sorry you had to go through that- I mean coming to this party" you knew hongjoong wasn't only talking about the party, you knew he had easily caught on to your words

You clenched his jacket as you wrapped it around your shoulders tighter to try to calm your aching heart. But as you looked up at the dark empty sky something in your heart broke, now before you never really understood why people used the term 'heartstrings' but right now you finally understood

Right now it felt like your some of your heartstrings snapped as you looked up, the dark looming sky seemed to want to shun you, like it was looking the other way not wanting to look at your pathetic state

"even the stars are hiding from me, no one wants to comfort me. Even the skies are not on my side" you managed to croak out as it felt like the last heartstrings that had held your poor heart together over the years of a one sided love finally snapped. Your heart shattered into pieces as you cried. The tears silently streaming down your face as you continued to wait...

You continued to wait for someone who would never love you back.