sixteen | lost without her

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     CARSON SAT WITH HER LEGS DANGLING over the edge of her dock

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     CARSON SAT WITH HER LEGS DANGLING over the edge of her dock. She was trying to process the day's events. She hated fighting with her friends, especially with John B because he was like a brother to her. But he had done something that she didn't know how to forgive. He didn't mean to fall for Sarah, but he was making decisions that affected the others.

"You okay?" She looked behind her to see JJ walking down the dock until he sat down next to her.

"I don't care if he wants to date Sarah, but to move into her house and to try to include her in our plans for the gold... that's not okay with me," she said.

"He's an idiot," he said. JJ wasn't actually mad at John B, not in the way that Carson and Kiara were, but he also agreed with the issue of letting Sarah into the plan. This was their thing. A Pogue thing.

"The worst part is that part of me feels like maybe she's right," she said. "Maybe I am jealous of her, jealous of her for things that she has that I don't. She got Ward, she got the big house and anything that she could ever want, and now she's getting John B." Maybe part of her was scared she was going to lose her one of her best friends.

"She doesn't have me," JJ said. She looked over at him and smiled.

"I don't think she would want you," she teased.

"I try to comfort you and you just insult me," he said, shaking his head. "You're cruel, Keller." She laughed and leaned into him. He wrapped his arms around her as she laid her back against his chest. They stared out into the marsh for a while before she spoke again.

"You don't think we're making a mistake by doing this, do you?" she asked, referring to the fact that they were starting something between them. It had been something that she was a little worried about. She didn't them to go too far before it was too late and they ruined their friendship.

"Do you?" he said. She could feel that he had tensed up when she had asked it. JJ wasn't close with many people and he was scared to let people in, so if she had any doubts about him, he needed to know. 

"No," she said. The amount of confidence in her answer immediately made him relax again. "I just- you're the person I am closest to. I trust you more than anyone, and I can't imagine my life without you, JJ. I just don't want anything to ruin that."

"I've had a crush on you since the 3rd grade, okay? At some point I just kind of gave up on the idea of us, and then you kissed me. I tried to pretend like it didn't matter because I knew if you rejected me that it would just hurt too much," he admitted. "You will always have me because I can't afford to lose you. You're pretty much all I have left, Car." Besides their friends, JJ didn't have much. He had no family and he had no idea what he wanted to do with his life. Carson and the others were the only things that kept him going. She was the one consistent thing in his life. He would be lost without her.

She couldn't find the right words to equate to his, so she just turned around so that her legs were wrapped around his waist and kissed him. He didn't hesitate in kissing her back. Carson realized then that she couldn't picture herself being with anyone but him. Carson pushed him to want to be a better person and JJ pushed her to test any rule that existed in life. They were the best thing that could happen for each other and there was no mistake in that.


Carson and Kiara weren't amused when Pope insisted that he needed their help to tow JJ and John B out of the marsh. They didn't understand why they couldn't figure it out themselves, but they ended up agreeing to go anyway. 

"Can't you guys do anything without us?" Kiara asked as her and Carson climbed on board to the Alp. They walked in to find John B and JJ leaned over trying to figure out how to fix what was broken. "What happened?"

"Uh, the alternator's, uh, not alternating anymore," JJ said.

"It's not charged," John B said.

"Did you check the plugs?" Kiara asked.

"No. No, you should check 'em," JJ said. "Give it a whirl."

"You guys are useless," she said. Carson shook her head as the two girls moved past the boys to try to figure it out themselves. 

"What would they do without us?" she said as she leaned down next to Kiara. When she looked in though, she realized there weren't even any plugs. "Wait a second."

"Uh, is this a joke?" Kiara called out. "There are no plugs, like, at all." Carson glanced back when she realized the boys didn't answer, just to find that they were jumping overboard.

"Kie, they're leaving," she said. They both jumped up and ran to the front of the boat. The sound of banging from underneath the boat and Sarah screaming John B's name made Carson stop. She leaned down to slide the door open to find Sarah looking back at her. "Sarah?"

"What? Wait!" Sarah said when she realized what was going on.

"Guys!" Kiara screamed. "Are you joking? Get your asses back here!"

"We can't! Not till you three figure it out!" John B said. Carson ran a frustrated hand through her hair. She wasn't quite sure what Kiara's problem was with Sarah, not specifically anyway, but she knew exactly what her problem with her was. It was the fact that they shared the same father. The fact that the boys thought leaving them stranded on a boat was going to fix that problem seemed ridiculous.

"I will kill every single one of you!" Kiara threatened.

"Starting with you, JJ!" Carson screamed. Just as she thought he was being understanding about the situation she was in, and he just gangs up with John B and Pope to force the girls to solve their issues.

"Sorry, Car! You'll thank me later!" he said. 

"You can't just leave!" Sarah said.

"There's food in the cabin, and JJ rolled a blunt," Pope said.

"Hydroponic!" JJ added.

"This is ridiculous," Sarah said as she kicked off her shoes and clothes to try to swim.

"Well, I would rather drown than stay here with you, so..." Kiara said, going to do the same. 

"Fine, be my guest. Maybe you'll finally shut the hell up," Sarah snapped.

"You don't even know where you're going," Kiara pointed out.

"I don't care."

"You're just going to get lost," Carson said. She didn't even bother trying to do anything about it. The boys were already leaving them and swimming was just not going to be option all the way out in the marsh like that. One of the clear reasons why was exactly what happened to Sarah. 

"I got stung by a jellyfish! Shit!" Sarah said. 

"Dramatic," Kiara muttered. "Well, you swam right into a Man O' War, I don't know what you thought was gonna happen."

"Thank you for your help," Sarah replied sarcastically. She climbed onto the boat and slowly lowered herself until she was sitting against it. "Shit. Ow."

"Does it hurt?"

"Hey, Kiara, you know what they say... about curing jellyfish stings?" she said. "You have to pee on me." When it was clear that Kiara was not going to do it, Sarah looked at Carson. "Please, Carson. It really hurts."

"There's no way in hell that I'm gonna pee on you," Carson said. Kiara sighed.

"I have a better idea."

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