Exes & Ohs

Funeral Part 2

She's laying in her childhood bed that night. She knows it's unfair that she's in a warm bed with Ethan's strong arm wrapped around her while Betsy's in the cold damp dirt. She knows that the rest of her life will be comprised of warm beds versus frigid ground.

Her cat, Schrodinger, slinks into the room. Odette thinks she is a cat, aloof and mysterious. When Schrodinger meows a plea for petting she realizes she must be a cat, begging for attention and love. Needing to be cared for, but always ready to bare claws and sharp teeth.

The family dog, Montgomery, stares through the slit of the open door before trotting in behind Schrodinger. She thinks Ethan is a dog with his undying, fiercely loyal love. His puppy dog brown eyes don't hurt the analogy either. She thinks cats can see better in the dark than dogs. And with Odette's past, she knows her eyes are better adjusted to the dark than Ethan's. Cats & Dogs aren't supposed to get along. She muses, but Montgomery was raised with Schrodinger around, the two don't know any better.

Odette knows better.

But she's always been a rule breaker.

If only for the sake of breaking rules.

Odette lays there mindlessly stroking Schrodinger, eventually he's had enough and with a stretch he walks off, on the prowl for midnight prey. Montgomery hops off the bed he knows he isn't supposed to be on and follows suit.

Ethan is a rule breaker too.

But only to protect those he loves, like Montgomery.

She thinks about waking Ethan up. She has this urge to shake him awake and then give him a blow job, even though she's seen porn and knows how ridiculous girls look with a cock in their mouth. She knows he'll like it, probably push her head down lightly with his hands and teach her how he best likes to be sucked.

Afterwards she'll probably fuck him.

It's when she looks over at his angelic face that she realizes what she's doing. Or considering doing. She wants to mindlessly lay there and take a pounding. She wants to try to fuck the pain away, it's something she'd do if Ethan were Anthony. Anthony loved fucking her harder than her self hate. Always rougher than the time before because afterwards she always hated herself more.

She doesn't want things to be like they were with Anthony. She can't even see Ethan fucking her that way. When she pictures sex with Ethan, it's all lazy thrusts, tender caresses, and whispered sweet nothings. With Anthony is was always nothing sweet.

But she has seen Fear Nights, seen Ethan play Leon. Leon likes it rough. She knows Ethan is capable of pretending. She wonders if he'd pretend for her.

But they have yet to have sex.

And maybe she doesn't want Ethan to pretend. Maybe all she wants is Ethan for everything he is and all the things he's not.

She rolls over to face Ethan and lays her head on his chest and goes to sleep.