Survivors Of The Lost

12

The tension in the room had eased by the time we all were seated. I, ma and aunty katheeja sat in one sofa. Opposite to us umar and shayan were seated. In the middle sofa uncle Muhammad and uncle imran were seated. I stayed silent the whole time. Ma and aunty were talking. Uncle Muhammad and uncle Imran were talking. Remaining 3 of us stayed silent.

Right then eram came out of the kitchen holding a tray of tea cups. She was wearing a burka and the shawl wrapped around her head nicely. For a moment I envied her. She did have the courage to wear and I didnt.

Aunty katheeja helped her put the tray on the tea table. She just stood near the middle sofa, looking down. She looked more pretty in person. "She is my daughter, eram." Uncle Imran introduced us to her. She looked up and smiled at us. "Assalamu Alaikum" her voice was feminine. We all replied to her.

Aunty katheeja gestured eram to come forward. She came forward and served tea to everyone. "I think now the kids should talk." Uncle Muhammad suggested to uncle Imran. He nodded his head. "Eram take umar to the balcony." Aunty katheeja spoke. Eram nodded her head. Umar stood up to go. "I think its better if shayan and ayah accompany them." Uncle Imran spoke with furrowed brows. Me and shayan? But why?

I looked at ma for help but for once she didnt look at me. Uncle Muhammad looked ma for permission and ma nodded her head. I didnt want to go. Uncle Muhammad nodded his head to grant his permission. Then ma looked at me and smiled. I got up and went near eram and umar. Shayan trailed behind us.

The atmosphere in the balcony was tensed. Umar and eram at one side talking god knows what and me and shayan standing at one side. The garden was covered with grasses. Maybe fake grasses?

I held the railing tightly. Shayan was beside me. His one hand holding his blazer and other in his pocket. He stared straight. I didnt dare look at him again. I was afraid of being caught red-handed while staring.

"What do you do?" It took me sometime to realise that he was talking to me. I looked at him to find him already looking at me. "I do nothing." I felt ashamed saying that. Im 25 years old and I do nothing?

He nodded in acknowledgement. "What do you do?" I repeated his question to him. I looked at him. "Have you heard about read express?" He asked me. "I have heard alot about it. Infact it is my favourite books publications. I have read all the books they have published." I replied looking at him. Thinking about the books itself brought a wide smile on my face. But why was he asking about it?

"I own that publication." I looked at him shocked. He owned that?

Yes you dumbhead. He is the Shayan Imran.

Why didnt I think about it earlier? I looked at him dumbfounded. For the first time in my life I saw him smile. Yeah I know I have met him only thrice but he looked more better while smiling. He was smiling but not looking at me. He was looking straight. Disappointment surged through because that smile didnt last long.

He cleared his throat and asked,"So what's your favourite?" I kept a finger on my chin and pretended to think. "Because your my wife." I exclaimed. That was the best story. I read it 4 times and I was thinking to read again.

He nodded his head. After that we didn't speak anything. He was the first guy I had come across who had interest in reading or books. I was happy to meet him. I was smiling widely whereas his lips were in a thin line.

I saw umar and eram comings towards us. Finally they were done talking. I released a breath I didn't know I was holding. Shayan was the first to leave. Eram looked at me and smiled. I smiled back at her. "So Its a yes?" I teased them. Eram blushed and umar just shook his head as if he was expecting it. They both went forward and I trailed behind him.

"How about January 28th?" Uncle Imran suggested. Both umar and eram said yes. Obviously. And now they are deciding the nikkah date. Everyone were here including shayan but he never for once spoke. Neither did I. Both the families wanted a simple nikkah. No functions before or after. A simple nikkah in masjid.

"Thats too soon" aunty katheeja commented. It was January 20th today. "What about February 5th?" Uncle Imran suggested again. Everyone nodded their head. So the date was fixed. I glanced at umar. He was so happy that he couldnt stop smiling.

"The dinner is ready." Aunty katheeja spoke. We had been discussing the things and getting to know each other for awhile. Just then shayan got up and went to the balcony. Uncle Imran sighed. "Lets have dinner." He changed the topic with such ease. We all went to the dining room.

Just as I was seated my phone started ringing. That was so unusual. No one called me for years now except for ma and umar. I looked at the number. It was an unknown number. I excused myself and answered the call. But I couldnt hear anything from the other side. This happened for a few times.

"Beta maybe there is no network here. You will get network in the balcony or out in the garden." Uncle Imran said. I nodded and went to the balcony. Right then my phone ringed again. I answered the call. This time I could hear the person from the other side.

"Hello, Can I talk to Miss Ayah please?" The person spoke. It was a voice of a female. I didnt know who this was but the voice seemed familiar.

"Yes talking. May I know who this is?"

"Iam talking from the orphanage." Then it suddenly hit me. How could I forget? I recognized this voice. This voice belonged to the caretaker of the orphanage where I usually visit.

"Are you there?" Her voice broke me out of my trance.

"Yeah Im listening."

"How is marriage going? Its been more than almost a year since you talked to us or visited us. Even I lost my phone so I lost all my contacts. It was very difficult to find your number." I felt guilty for being so selfish. How could forget about it? I should be ashamed.

"We divorced."

"Oh dear what happened?"

"Lets forget about the past."

"Ohkay as you wish dear. I just called you remind that its after 2 days. Kids are eagerly waiting for you." I knew what was after 2 days. January 22nd was the day I lost my parents. I became an orphan. It will be five years then. I didnt forget. It just slipped from my mind. But how could I forget the kids. I felt disgusted at myself. I busied myself so much. I couldnt visit them the entire year. I would save money and provide them speical lunch on this date. Nanny called me to remimd the lunch.

"Yeah I remember. Ill be there." I told her. We talked for a few minutes and we hung up. I stood there for awhile calming my rapidly beating heart.

I collided with someone when I turned around to go. I lost my balance. I was about to hit my butt on the floor when someone caught me from my elbow.  I closed my eyes waiting for the impact which never came. I slowly opened my eyes and peeked at the person who saved me. It was none other than shayan.

He steadied me. Once he was sure I wont fall, he let go of my hand. I looked at him accusingly. He raised his hands in surrender and went inside the house. Did he hear me talking over the phone? If yes then how much? What about my divorce? Why was he standing right behind me?

Was he going to push me from here? But why?

I shook my head to clear my never-ending questions and went inside. "You could talk?" Ma questioned me as soon as she saw me. I nodded at her. She smiled at me and continued eating. The dining table was not too long. Only 10 people could eat at once. I sat next to eram. She smiled at me and started serving me dinner.

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