My good irl friend, Aurorablues221 (she's awesome, definitely go check her out!!) published a hilarious chapter where she used a short story generator... it was interesting.
So... yep, I tried it myself.
I have to share some of the amazing results...
THE MOON THAT SHONE LIKE LOVING HAMSTERS
Josh England had always loved deserted Plymouth with its queasy, quick quarries. It was a place where he felt relaxed.
He was a spiteful, giving, whiskey drinker with scrawny thighs and short legs. His friends saw him as an angry, attractive animal. Once, he had even helped a skinny old lady cross the road. That's the sort of man he was.
Josh walked over to the window and reflected on his grey surroundings. The moon shone like loving hamsters.
Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Sophia Smart. Sophia was a tactless carer with chubby thighs and sticky legs.
Josh gulped. He was not prepared for Sophia.
As Josh stepped outside and Sophia came closer, he could see the wooden smile on her face.
Sophia gazed with the affection of 4607 cowardly bloody badgers. She said, in hushed tones, "I love you and I want a pencil."
Josh looked back, even more calm and still fingering the crumpled piano. "Sophia, what's up Doc," he replied.
They looked at each other with lonely feelings, like two giant, green guppies sleeping at a very scheming Christening, which had R & B music playing in the background and two vile uncles loving to the beat.
Josh studied Sophia's chubby thighs and sticky legs. Eventually, he took a deep breath. "I'm sorry," began Josh in apologetic tones, "but I don't feel the same way, and I never will. I just don't love you Sophia."
Sophia looked confident, her emotions raw like a kaleidoscopic, kindhearted kettle.
Josh could actually hear Sophia's emotions shatter into 676 pieces. Then the tactless carer hurried away into the distance.
Not even a glass of whiskey would calm Josh's nerves tonight.
THE END
THE HAIL THAT POUNDED LIKE RUNNING MAGGOTS
Hannah Olsson was thinking about Mavis Godfrey again. Mavis was a thoughtful brute with beautiful ankles and fat eyebrows.
Hannah walked over to the window and reflected on her chilly surroundings. She had always loved rural Madrid with its late, loopy lakes. It was a place that encouraged her tendency to feel relaxed.
Then she saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the a thoughtful figure of Mavis Godfrey.
Hannah gulped. She glanced at her own reflection. She was a proud, grateful, cocoa drinker with ample ankles and slimy eyebrows. Her friends saw her as a grim, gentle gamer. Once, she had even helped a yucky kitten recover from a flying accident.
But not even a proud person who had once helped a yucky kitten recover from a flying accident, was prepared for what Mavis had in store today.
The hail pounded like running maggots, making Hannah happy. Hannah grabbed a stripy blade that had been strewn nearby; she massaged it with her fingers.
As Hannah stepped outside and Mavis came closer, she could see the uneven smile on her face.
"I am here because I want justice," Mavis bellowed, in a cold-blooded tone. She slammed her fist against Hannah's chest, with the force of 7015 lizards. "I frigging love you, Hannah Olsson."
Hannah looked back, even more happy and still fingering the stripy blade. "Mavis, oh my God they killed Kenny," she replied.
They looked at each other with puzzled feelings, like two black, blue bears loving at a very spiteful carol service, which had indie music playing in the background and two popular uncles hopping to the beat.
Hannah regarded Mavis's beautiful ankles and fat eyebrows. She held out her hand. "Let's not fight," she whispered, gently.
"Hmph," pondered Mavis.
"Please?" begged Hannah with puppy dog eyes.
Mavis looked angry, her body blushing like a relieved, roasted rock.
Then Mavis came inside for a nice mug of cocoa.
THE END
After that, I altered the settings... and made a Fantastic Beasts one. Hahah.
EDIT: I'M DYING IT'S AMAZING HAHAHAHA
TWO WONDERFUL UNCLES YEETING TO THE BEAT
Newt Scamander looked at the wiggly blade in his hands and felt angry.
He walked over to the window and reflected on his wet surroundings. He had always loved cold London with its rotten, red rivers. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to feel angry.
Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Tina Goldstein. Tina was a sympathetic porcupine with ginger hair and terrific freckles.
Newt gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was a virtuous, anxious, tea drinker with skinny hair and interesting freckles. His friends saw him as an alert, abundant angel. Once, he had even jumped into a river and saved a brief glass of water.
But not even a virtuous person who had once jumped into a river and saved a brief glass of water, was prepared for what Tina had in store today.
The rain hammered like backflipping ramoras, making Newt pathetic.
As Newt stepped outside and Tina came closer, he could see the dizzy glint in her eye.
"I am here because I want a Michael Jackson hat," Tina bellowed, in a humble tone. She slammed her fist against Newt's chest, with the force of 2870 occamys. "I frigging love you, Newt Scamander."
Newt looked back, even more pathetic and still fingering the wiggly blade. "Tina, nifflers are good," he replied.
They looked at each other with confident feelings, like two breezy, brief bowtruckles screenching at a very friendly funeral, which had jazz music playing in the background and two wonderful uncles yeeting to the beat.
Newt regarded Tina's ginger hair and terrific freckles. He held out his hand. "Let's not fight," he whispered, gently.
"Hmph," pondered Tina.
"Please?" begged Newt with puppy dog eyes.
Tina looked happy, her body blushing like a creepy, clumsy concerned duck.
Then Tina came inside for a nice cup of tea.
THE END
When I first read this one, I was found on the floor of the living room five minutes later suffering from an asthma attack. It took me ten minutes to find my inhaler, then sit there and breathe until I calmed down. I'm still wheezing XD
Well, that's all I have for you guys now. See you in the next chapter :3
