You Are My love (Edited)

Chapter 32

Tumto gussabhi karo to
Mujhey pyaar lagta hai jane kyu
Mainto jobhi karu tuhein ikraar lagta hai jane kyu...

Avni

I so wanted to keep my tensed heart relent but it of no use when it comes to our family, obviously his family is no less important than mine.
Ending the call with Neil, next I dailed Sweta Mom's number and she received in a single ring.

She wasn't that upset I had thought she would be. So it took me few minutes to erase the hostility,grump from her voice she was speaking in and was complaining about her son. Typical Sweta mom.

I just told her not to bother much about her son, he will be alright. And in reply she said she won't talk to him until Neil doesn't apologize to her. God, someday I'll definitely get a good lesson being between this mother and son. And that day would be end of everything. I swear.
I don't want to be that day comes either.

It's not that I'm scared of facing the truth, it's never been.
I get worried about our family. Would they be the same knowing it!
However Neil's family knows I'm not capable of being a perfect partner to their Son, neither SwetaMom would ever except me in that place.

She genuinely loves me, there aren't any doubt I have concerning the amount of adoration she showers over me apart from her both sons. She consider me as her daughter, but also, still like any other mother, she has some expectations, she wants her son to get a perfect life with his perfect partner.
Nevertheless as per as my medical report in this particular case there is hardly any possibility for me to be a part of it.
And considerably she is indeed right here not to accept me for her son and admittedly I'm okay with it. I can understand her.

When I think all these, I know I'm gonna be hurt so many people one day when they will get to know about us. But still I'm helpless here being a little selfish. Because the person who is the reason behind is everything to me now.All of me he is. Or I would say he has always been, only the difference is I realised it a bit lately.

I can't hurt him. It's not that I never think of it for the sake of his own good. I did it uncountable times. whenever I thought it everytime his words hit me and leaves me in a state Thantophobia, what if something happens more severe!
The words he said that day while confessing me his heart "Kabhi socha hai jinko aise majhdaar parr laakey chodh deteho tumlog, woh kaise jitey hai apni zindagi!!!
Pyaar k bina kaise kaat te honge woh itni lambi zindagi!!!"  I can't hurt him. If I do, it will be the worst of me and I know this time he won't leave things go simple. I can feel it.
Shit I don't want to think of it either. He was right, no one stays happy doing such bullshit sacrifices. Tt just satisfies the tendency we get obsessed with compromising things we love the most. Life isn't easy, we need to fight things  work out.

It was the difference case when I wasn't sure if he is serious or even in love with me. Yes I was aware of his liking towards me but I haven't idea about how deep it was. Apparently when it's cristal clear to me now he is, then I won't let him down. Not this time.
No matter how difficult it could be to deal with it,we will be together and find ways out not to be apart anymore, it's enough we have stayed away those years.
We are both adults and we know we are not doing something nonacceptable. As Neil says everything not move as per as always we wish for, sometimes we need to focus on the priority our life holds, we need to give it a thought, push that thing aside we want the most and think our life without it and put the other things at it's place we have in our life. And then the answer we will get doing so, will be the decision we have to make for ourself next. That what he said he did with us, and the answer he got everytime the same; that  day will be death of his soul if he loose me.