To Make You Come Back To Me (EXO's KAI FANFICTION) | COMPLETED

Chapter 5: I want to cry!

Jongin took a very deep breath when he released me from his arms. I immediately felt the emptiness in my heart. I never thought I would be this empty.

He looked at me as he took something out of his pocket. "Here. Wipe you own tears." He said in a very cold tone as he handed me a handkerchief.

I looked at it and shook my head. "No, Jongin. You need to hear me out first." I wanted this to end. I'm going to tell him everything now. I want all of this to stop. If he hears my explanation and still decides to leave me, I won't blame him.

He looked at me and pursed his lips in a thin line.

I wiped my tears with my palm and swallowed the lump in my throat. "It's my parents." I started and snorted. "They wanted me to finish my studies abroad for better chances of getting the best job in the future." I looked at him and his eyes are on me, waiting for me to continue with my story.

I exhaled. "At first, I didn't want to...I don't want to leave you. But they pressured me every day. They said I needed to go if I didn't want to get disowned." I sobbed. "My parents wanted me to be the best because I am the first born. They wanted me to bring in lots of money for our family—"

"Let's just jump to the part where you left me." He interrupted me. "Why did you just leave me without a word then? I would've done something about it! I would've done something about us!"

"I'm sorry!" I cried because that's all I think I can ever do. I cannot bring the past back. If he would only let me, I could fix our present for our future.

He pursed his lips in a thin line. "You're always sorry." He told me in the coldest tone I have ever heard. "What are you really sorry about? The ruined relationship? The pain I went through? What, Eunhye? What are you sorry for?"

I shut my eyes and wiped my tears. "Everything. I'm sorry for everything I have caused—our relationship, the pain you went through and all those many other things I have done." I sobbed. "I want you to know that I didn't want to leave you. I love you so much—"

"Then why did you leave?! If you loved me so much, how could you leave me without a word?! Huh, Eunhye? Why did you just leave me alone without thinking about what hell I will go through when you're gone?!" He's hysterical. He's shouting and is in pain.

Frustration flashed through his eyes. And hatred. And anger. And I wanted to wipe them all away and change them back to the way he looks at me four years ago.

"It was the only way—"

"Oh, goddamn it, Eunhye! You could have asked me to help! You didn't even bother asking me if I wanted to have a long distance relationship!"

"I know you didn't want one!"

"Still you should have asked!" He yelled. "I loved you. You were the only person I see. I took very good care of you. Even when we did it, I tried my best to not hurt you!" He washed his palms over his face. "Eunhye, where did my decision lie? Where was my decision in our relationship?"

I bit my lip and looked down. I know where he's coming from. He could yell at me all he wants. I'm not going to answer back. I'm not going to talk back because I know that I deserve every single word he is throwing at me. All these accusations and blames, I deserve every single one of them.

"You think if you told me that you'll leave, I won't let you?" He asked. "Eunhye, I admit I won't let you at first but I would never ever do something against your decision...even if it would hurt me so fucking much!"

I cried and all these realizations rushed through me. He's right. I should've given him the chance to decide for us. If I wasn't so scared enough to even bring up the topic in front of him before, we could have prevented all these heartaches to happen.