Tuesday

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“Poy, ako nalang.”

I glanced at the bottle of soju that I was about to pour.

Wala na

I searched for an unopened bottle of soju in the group of bottles that I have on the table but there were none.

“Bash, she had me at my worst, you had me at my best but you chose to break my heart.”

I tried to stand from my couch but my head failed to let me. I groaned in pain because of hangover and the eye strain that I got because of watching random movies all night.

I grabbed the remote and turned off the T.V. which turned my room into a vast, dark space.

I sighed heavily as random thoughts of my ex-boyfriend filled my head again

Pinaghirapan kong ifill ng ibang bagay ang utak ko sa kaiinom at panonood ng mga movies buong gabi pero heto ulit ako ngayon. In just a minute, he's still inside my head, he's still fulfilling my overall being. He's still a part of me.

I was startled when my phone rang. I saw the name of my boss in the screen of my phone.

Ni hindi man lang ako nagdalawang isip na hindi iyon sagutin.

“Parang last week lang nerbyos na nerbyos ka kada nakikita yung pangalan ni sir Ricky sa screen mo ha, Keisha.” I thought to myself.

I glanced at my phone when it rang again but this time it was Rina, my best friend and colleague. I wanted to answer her call but my body declined to release a voluntary motion.

After her call went off, I heard knocks from my door at iniluwa nito si Rina.

“Oh my God, Keisha!” She said at the time she looked at me after she turned on the lights that made me squint.

“Keisha, haven't you checked your phone yet?” Tanong nito habang binubuksan ang lahat ng kurtinang makita niya sa room ko.

“Galit na galit si sir Ricky kasi hindi mo pa raw sinusubmit yung revised version nung libro mo.” Sabi niya sa akin while trying to clean my table from all the bottles of soju and the empty bags of junk foods.

“Keisha, you should go back already. 4 days ka ng wala sa work. Madami ka pang kailangan gawin, it's not the time for this.” She said while doing the dishes for me.

I just sat at my couch while she do the dishes and ignored every word that she said. I just continued to stare at nothing.

“I know this is that week of the year again pero hindi mo naman kailangang gawin ng paulit-ulit ‘to sa sarili mo.” Sabi ni Rina pagkalapit niya sa akin with a concerned voice.

“Keisha, nandito pa ang family mo, nandito kami ng mga kaibigan mo, nandito ka. You have us, you have your dream job, and people who loves you and your works.”

“Please, stop torturing yourself over and over again from what happened 7 years ago.” She said to me while I still stare at nothing.

She glanced at her watch for a sec then looked at me again.

“I have to go now, and please, check your phone from time to time, okay? Ako na muna bahala kay sir Ricky. Come back soon!” She said and head outside my room.

I sighed and checked my phone.

It's April 7 already.

It's time to meet him again.

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