Eternal Love: Beynika Oneshots

Chemistry X

Ain't nobody tell me this is love
When you're immune to all my pain
I need you to tell me this is love
You don't care?
Well, that's okay
_______

"Mimi. Are you going to let me in, today?"

I stood at Aminah's door with my forehead pressed against it. It had been a full week since I had broken the news to her that Onika wouldn't be joining us for cupcakes on her birthday. She'd been locked inside of her bedroom since. The only person she allowed inside was Solange.

Silence.

"Mimi. I know you hear me, baby. You're really hurting my feelings not talking to me."

"You really hurt my feelings!" she yelled. "Why didn't you just tell her about me? Are you embarrassed about me?" She knew that wasn't true. I was extremely proud of her. Everything she'd overcome and everything that she'd become.

"Aminah. You know that isn't true. I love you. Open the door."

"I will not!" she fussed. "I'm mad at you. You ruined everything for me. If you had just told her about me, then she would be coming to have cupcakes with me. I cannot believe you, Ma."

"Me either, Mimi. I really messed up, baby."

"You really did!" she agreed.

"Now, you've locked me out of your room and she's locked me out of her life. I can't win here."

I made myself comfortable on the floor. It was the only way I could talk to my six-year-old. This was a form of protest, as she referred to it. Her lockout was causing me to shut down. With her and Onika upset with me at the same time, I was living in hell. I hadn't heard a peep from or seen her. She hadn't even been to the plant. Thing were still running smoothly, but if she didn't return soon, I would be in deep shit - so would my business.

"You shouldn't. This is all your fault, Mommy."

I could feel her near. She'd joined me on the other side of the door, seated and waiting for my response. Aminah missed me as much as I missed her, but I was allowing her stance. I deserved it. I'd handled the situation with Onika wrong and needed to be held accountable for my actions.

"I know, Mimi. How are you doing in there?"

"Can I send her a message? Maybe she will change her mind."

"No. Let's let Nicki be. I dropped some pretty heavy stuff on her about still being married to your mother and about why you had your leg amputated. I'm sure she needs time to process everything."

"Do you still love Ms. Maraj, Ma?" Aminah whispered, remembering our secret.

"Very much, Mimi."

"Then why am I the only one you're being nice to? Why aren't you waiting by Onika's door?"

The questioned Aminah posed silenced me. I hadn't attempted to reach out to Onika. Instead, I'd stalked her Instagram each time I found myself missing her - which was quite often. She hadn't posted a single photo since the night before things had gone left with us. That in itself was a sure sign that she was hurting, too.

"I've never done any of this before, Mimi. The only woman I've come close to loving was your mother, but I'm beginning to believe it was due to my attachment to you from birth."

"Did she make you feel like Ms. Maraj makes you feel?"

"No. Not even close, baby."

"Then, I don't think you should be at my door, Mommy. I think you should be at her door."