A Wrench in the Gears [Damien Haas]

21. Ian with a bow!

Hey, guys! Yay, yay, yay!

Thank you, guys, for 1.2k! Let's keep this going. Woop woop!

I hope you guys are safe from the coronavirus and your governments are doing something about it. Don't forget to wash your hands, follow coughing and sneezing etiquette, and just sanitize regularly. I keep a nice sanitizing kit in my bag at all times, and I recommend you to do that.

And 20 seconds of hand-washing. A good tip would be singing happy birthday twice, or as I prefer: Hamilton's "Aaron Burr, Sir" from the lines: "Sir, I heard your name at Princeton" until "So how'd you do it, how'd you graduate so fast?"

Well, anyway, enough nerding out here for me. Damien's point of view! See ya!

-/-/-

Jade took a day off work today, because she's gonna formally apply for Smosh as a part-time employee for our segment. I mean, the segment may be approved, but Jade has to go through the process just for formality. I wait outside Ian's office scrolling through her Instagram photos of us for the past six months.

The first month was:

5,703 likes
jadegreene.jpeg First day on Smosh! Looking forward to three months with the amazing Shayne, Courtney, Ian, Mari, Damien, and everyone else. They're already awesome.

The second month was:

10,346 likes
jadegreene.jpeg After being stuck in an elevator together for the second time, Damien and I ate at this lovely diner. No promotions whatsoever. Just kidding: awesome chicken parmesan here, and I have a witness.

The third month was:

20,736 likes
jadegreene.jpeg Two (2) walnut-allergic people with one (1) title to win coming through! 2 Truths and 1 Lie with Damien and Jade is out.

The fourth month was:

40,142 likes
jadegreene.jpeg Name: Damien Christian Haas
Status: That's my boyfriend get away from him please

The fifth month was:

50,150 likes
jadegreene.jpeg We went to Japan and it was great! First of many spontaneous trips with the boyfriend picked by destiny. I love you so much.

And of course, this month had:

40,944 likes
jadegreene.jpeg Cheers to Jenna and Chris! Attended their wedding in style and with the best boyfriend in the world.

There were so many more pictures of us, but I knew mine had more. So of course, I also went to check out mine.

The first month had:

43,876 likes
damienhaas Athens × Smosh underway. Very awesome people!

The second month had:

52,300 likes
damienhaas Two words: Bolognese spaghetti. Another two words: with jade. Another pair of words: just awesome.

The third month had:

67,289 likes
damienhaas Water guns scare me now. Did I win at all? 2 Truths and 1 Lie with Jade just got uploaded, so go check it!

The fourth month had:

78,906 likes
damienhaas She's my

GRRRRRRLFRIEND (periodt)

The fifth month had:

89,418 likes
damienhaas We went to Japan, and my girlfriend's one of the best photographers I know. But I'm keeping her away from the karaoke. I love you despite your weird singing voice.