Roxanne Taylor (Born 16th October 1951) is Roger Taylor's cousin. The two of them have always been close despite the distance between them. Every year, she spends a month in London with him when his university is out but the summer of '72, well she...
"Sorry guys," he shrugs, "This is our new normal now."
Yeah, they weren't impressed in the slightest.
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The third time Arthur wakes, Roxanne feels as if she's barely been asleep for ten minutes.
Forcing herself to open her eyes, she glances at the clock before looking at John, seeing that, once again, he's dead to the world.
Not having the heart to wake him, she gets up and pads around the bed to see to him.
It's been a while since his last feed and so she carries him back through to the living room so they don't wake John, sitting down on the couch while undoing a couple of the buttons of John's shirt at the same time, resting her head back against the couch.
He doesn't latch on. So now, she's not entirely sure what's wrong with him. If he's not hungry, what else could it be? She waits for a couple of minutes though, giving Arthur a little bit of time but he clearly doesn't want to feed, little hand practically pushing her away and so she gives up, quickly buttoning up the shirt again while he continues to wail.
His nappy is also clean and dry, which means that he doesn't need changing, so Roxanne stands up and starts rocking him back to sleep, singing the same song that she sang to him in the hospital but it doesn't do anything and Arthur continues to cry.
Roxy looks up at the ceiling, silent begging herself not to start crying. Why wasn't he settling down? Why couldn't she tell what he needed?
She tries for another ten to fifteen minutes and when the baby is still crying -and she is too- she throws in the towel and returns to the bedroom to wake John.
"John?" she whispers, trying to wipe away the tears on her cheeks before he wakes, "John?"
He makes a sort of humming noise but doesn't wake - how he's managing to sleep through Arthur's crying, Roxanne really doesn't know because the kid is currently wailing.
"John, please," she begs, resorting in giving his shoulder a firm but gentle shove, which finally wakes him.
It takes him a few moments to wake up properly but once he does and he hears Arthur crying and sees Roxanne's tears, he quickly sits up.
"Hey," he murmurs, "What's going on?"
"I-I don't know what's wrong with him," she chokes, "I don't-he doesn't want fed, he's clean and dry. John, I-"
He gets up from the bed and wraps his arms around her, Arthur still crying in between them. It hurts him to see her like this; all upset when all she wants to do is take care of him =.
"You said you tried feeding him?" he asks softly, taking Arthur from her as she nods.
"He wouldn't latch on," she wipes at her eyes, mouth dropping slightly when his cries quieten down a little bit, "I-how did you do that?"
"Do what?" John continues to rock Arthur and it's not long before he's fast asleep again and instead of calming down, Roxanne feels herself getting even more upset.
"Rox?" he questions, "Come on, love, please don't cry."
"I can't help it," she sniffles, "I just feel like I cant tell what he wants. What he needs."
John frowns and places Arthur down in his crib, making sure he's snug in his blanket before he sits down on the bed.
"Hey," he whispers, pressing his forehead against her shoulder.
"I feel useless," she cries, wiping her eyes once more, "Why can't I tell what he wants?"
"Rox," he sighs, wrapping his arms around her again, "This is new to us both, Rox."
"But I'm supposed to be know. I'm supposed to be his mum. I feel like I'm failing him."
"Don't say that," he kisses her forehead, "You're tired, love. We both are and running on this little sleep, it's not helping either of us."
"Will it get easier?"
"It will," he promises, "But it'll just take a little bit of time."
"I love you," she whispers, "And I'm sorry that I woke you."
"Don't apologise, Rox. We're in this together."
"You not going to say it back?" she teases and he's relieved to see a smile back on her face. In response to her question, he rolls his eyes, kissing her softly.
"I love you too."
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me; i'm going to write a full chapter today!
also me five minutes later;
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this is exactly why the chapter is so late in going up - i have the attention span of a goldfish
i won't lie to you guys, i don't know why but this story...i'm finding it a lot harder to write compared to STL and it sucks because i love this story and i want to write the best possible chapters for you guys but it's just so hard sometimes
