As it Should Be (Johnlock/Teenlock)

quinze

(A/N): This one's slightly darker, but it gets fluffier towards the end! Also set a few days after they were at Johns house.
!!!Tiny Trigger warning!!!:If anything to do with death or dark inner voices triggers you, don't read this! I'll probably sum it up at the end.!!!

John's P.O.V.
Everything is so messed up.
What did I do to deserve this? Why can't I have a life where I don't have to sit and worry about my mother's possible death?
The hospital says she's not in the right state of mind for visitors, they don't know when she will be.
If she ever is..
Shut up.
You know she's not getting better..
Leave me alone. I'm not going to listen to you. Of course she'll get better.
You keep on thinking that, Johnny Boy..

"John?!" Sherlock shook me out of my trance, cautiously feeling my forehead, most likely searching for a fever. I felt feverous, but only in my mind.

"Do you need a doctor?" No, of course I didn't. I hated those places right now- my aspirations of going to medical school were fading. How could I be a doctor if hospitals scared me?

"No, Sherlock, I'm okay." I wasn't.

"Are you sure? You have increased sweat mole-"
"Sherlock! Leave. Me. Alone!" I cut him off abruptly, my angry eyes staring into his, seething for unknown reasons. However, my anger dimmed slightly at his reaction. His concern-filled eyes dulled, he pulled away and crossed the room to his desk, where he sat with his knees to his chest (which must have been uncomfortable in the already small desk chair) and opened his laptop, tapping away at the keys, although he obviously had no interest in his work. There was to be no reaching him now. I sighed, slipping back into my previous state.

Sherlock's P.O.V.

What did I do wrong? Why, weren't you supposed to be that conscious of your friend's emotions? Did he pick up on my feelings? How could he have done? I thought the word friend with a certain melancholy, and I would have smirked if I was still able to perform positive functions. For once, my work wasn't interesting me. My studies of mutilated body parts was almost boring- was I ill?
I could sense the tension radiating from John, and couldn't think of a single way to numb it. Deciding to ignore it, I tried to get lost in my work, failing miserably.

After about an hour, it was becoming too much.
"John."
"Yes, Sherlock?" He sounded almost exasperated.
"Please stop feeling unhappy, it's affecting me." I regretted the harshness and selfishness of my words, why wasn't I thinking correctly? Was it to do with my revelation? Surely not..
"I'm sorry, John." He looked up, startled.
"What?" His eyes were wide.
"I'm sorry. Did you not hear me?" I started to become increasingly worried, did he have some form of memory loss?
"Yes, I just didn't believe it. What are you apologising for?"
"Whatever I did to upset you." I shuffled my feet nervously; this process was alien to me.
"It wasn't you, I'm just too alone with my thoughts." He ran his hands through his hair, gaining my attention immediately.
"Do you want to do something? It's not too late, we could go to the park, or wherever you want to go, I mean we don't have to if you don't want to..." Was I rambling? Damn you John...
"I'd love to." I smiled, biting my lip slightly. I only saw briefly, but I could have sworn there was slight pink in his cheeks.
"Shall we?" I wrapped my scarf around my neck, and shrugged on my coat. I grabbed his hand before I could reason with myself, and dragged him out of the door, and down towards the open air.

!!!!! Summary!!!!!
John is suffering with dark and upsetting thoughts and ends up snapping at Sherlock who is upset by this and questions John's motive to do that. He can't concentrate on his work so talks to John and they decide to go to the park. They hold hands. *fangirls at my own story*

(A/N):
Oh look, it's me again- aren't you lucky? I'm so so sorry for my awful updating, so much stuff has been going on which is beyond my control, and I'm genuinely apologetic. You guys deserve such a long chapter, and I'm sorry for that too. Feel free to nag me incessantly for another chapter, it reminds me to do it haha.
9K thoughhhhhh. That's insane!

I have an announcement to make!!
Firstly- I'm cutting my masses of hair off for charity on June 11th. If you feel like sponsoring me the link is on my profile under 'Go to my website' . Everything helps!!<3

Thank got guys so much for your support. I love you lots n lots :)