Be With Me

Chapter 71

"It was only three months break up Rafi, and if we consider that you couldn't see anyone in the hospital, then it's like you guys didn't break up at all, because you're together again. BUT..." Tony emphasized. "If you are not sure, then don't do it. I am afraid you two are just trying to find some replacement for Liam." He said in the end.

Rafaela sighed. She knew he would think that. "No..." She shook her head. "Maybe there's a few things you need to know about me and James that I haven't told you before, because we were separated, and I didn't tell you. Before Liam died, we were trying to have a baby." She said. "We wanted to have another kid back then."

"I see..." Tony said listening to her.

"So, I don't think we're trying to replace Liam." Rafaela fell silent for brief seconds and then spoke. "... I think we are trying to continue with the plans we already had." She explained.

"I get that." Tony nodded. "Have you and James talked about it during this weekend?"

"We have, well... not talk like really talk. He said he didn't mind and honestly, I wouldn't mind either. I know for sure that none of us is trying to replace Liam. I don't know... I really think we're trying to pick up our life where we left it before Liam died. We are trying to continue with our plans. I want to have more kids. I am really sure of that now, while right after Liam's death I wasn't so sure anymore. I think, I blamed us for his death... I don't know... I was afraid the same would happen."

"It was not your fault. Put that idea away from your mind." Tony said.

"I know.... I know... so now... now I know I want to have more kids and with James, of course, he's the man I love." Rafaela added.

Tony frowned a bit. Rafaela knew he didn't agree. "I am not quite sure if you guys aren't trying to replace Liam, the void he left. I think it's better to let some time go by, ok?"

"Ok." She agreed peacefully.

"Now, how do you feel about having him back?" Tony smiled and her lips also opened wonderfully. He noticed her eyes sparkling and never had he seen her smile so full of joy.

"I feel great. He was missing in my life. I missed him like crazy, so I feel great. I want to treasure him, and I want to please him and support him and help him and love him the best way I can. I want to give him the best of me. James deserves the best of me. I love him, I don't have doubts about that or blurred feelings blinding it. I love him and I want to love him in the way he deserves." She said sounding firm of her words and of her feelings.

Tony saw a strength he had yet seen in her until then. Rafaela was high on the road to full recovery and that pleased him.

"Doesn't it scare you that he's fighting an addiction?"

"No..." She shook her head. "It would scare me if I saw he had an addiction and he wasn't doing anything about it, but he's fighting it, so I am not scared. I have to support him the same way he's been supporting me. Even when I couldn't notice he was supporting me and he was all the time, even putting himself in second plan to make me his priority, that also destroyed him. So, I am not scared. I have to hold his hand and be there for him like he has been for me the whole time. James was there the whole time Tony, and I didn't see it."

"I think we're done for today." Tony announced.

"When do I have to come back?" She asked him, getting up.

"Call James inside. I want to talk to him first." Rafaela nodded and did as Tony asked.

"She's so happy." Tony told him as he closed the door, which made James smile.

"She was the one telling me. I tried to hold on, but since it came from her..." He explained.

"It's ok. I see so many improvements in her mood James. I am really happy, and I think now she is going to find her track back in life. She was lost out here because she was missing you and lost because she didn't know how to get through to you. Nice job. Now, I want to know how you have been feeling?"