Her

50

PHOENIX

"Okay, open this one first."

"How many presents did you get me?"

"Only three."

"That's three more than I asked for."

"Just open it."

"Okay, okay."

I give Aza the biggest one, tell her to open that one first. She does. Out comes a T-shirt with a superhero sign. She, grinningly, gets out of her top and puts her new T-shirt on.

"Looks good."

"Just good?"

"Very good."

"Thanks," she says. "Now I'm a real superhero."

"You've always been."

"True."

I tell Aza to open the bigger one of the two remaining presents. She picks up the wrapped up present, scanning it with her hands.

"Feels like a framed picture," she says.

"Maybe."

"I hope it's nudes."

She rips it open and looks at the image. She smiles.

"Do you like it?"

"It's beautiful."

"Like the person who made it."

"Like the person who made it."

She gives me a kiss and a thank you, then looks at the picture again, at the pressed colourful flowers.

"Wait," she says. "These flowers - are they...?"

"They are."

The flowers inside the frame are the flowers which I got Aza the day I first told her I love her. I smile, knowing she recognised them.

"By the way," I say, "there's something on the back."

She turns it over, looks at the back, then reads it out loud.

"Happy birthday to you, my beautiful brainless baby boo. Roses are red," she says, "Violets are blue, I hate you." She laughs. "I hate you too," she whispers, kissing me.

After a while, I pull away, but she kisses me again, so I kiss her back. It goes like this for a while, until I, laughing, pull away and say, "Presents, Aze - there's still one left."

"Okay," she sighs, smiling, and picks up the last present.

"It's a bit cheesy," I say, "but um..." I bite my thumbnail. "I don't know."

"Oh, so it's cheese then?"

"Yes, moron."

She opens it. She looks at it, blinks, looks at it.

"It's a phoenix necklace. As you can obviously see. Because, you know, you have eyes. And, well, it's - I thought it was cute, and quite fitting. My name's Phoenix - as you obviously know - and I'm your girlfriend, and the necklace has a little phoenix, and - I don't know. Phoenixes are cool, and, you know..."

Aza's face breaks into a smile. "I love it," she says, her brown eyes twinkling. "I love you," she adds, her voice soft.

"I love you too."

"Will you put it on for me?" she asks.

I nod. I brush her hair away, carefully, put the necklace on and lock it. My fingertips tingle her neck, then my mouth touches her skin, caresses it. I tell her I love her and tell her I want to give her another birthday present.

Then, we lay there, on her bed, talking, touching. It seems weird to me to think that there had ever been a time where changing clothes in the same room as Aza would be awkward. It feels like that time was a time spent in another life. Now, I know Aza's body as well as I know mine. Her body is like a caramel coloured land, with all its softness, curves and scars my favourite one to visit.

"So you basically told your mum that you're going out with Ky?"

"Basically, yes."

"I feel very offended."

"I am very sorry."

"A kiss might make me feel better."

I kiss her.

"Isn't it weird though that she'd rather let you stay at Ky's than at my place?"

"Maybe," I say. "Weirdness runs in our family."

"I've noticed."

"Shut up."

"Make me."

I kiss her.

"Phoenix?"

"Aza?"

"Don't you want to tell her? At some point?"

A moment of silence.

"Maybe."

"Maybe?"

"Maybe. Around Christmas, maybe."

"That's pretty soon, less than a month."

"I know. The others are actually going to fly over. Maise and Josh are really excited. They can't wait to meet you."

"Really?" Aza stops playing with my hair. She looks at me, her expression something like touched and puzzled. "You told them about me?"

"Of course I have. I mean, I haven't told them that you're my girlfriend and all that. But yes, I've talked about you."

"Did you tell them how bloody awesome I am?"

"I told them how bloody annoying you are."

"Shut up."

"Make me."

She kisses me.

"And by the way," I say, sitting up. "I have another present for you."

"You said you had three."

"Maths isn't my speciality."

I get the present and give it to her.

"It's not even a real present," I say, biting my thumbnail, watching her take off the ribbon.

She opens the little box, looks inside and takes out the card. She looks at it, frowns, reads the words on the card. I see her mouth forming the words, reading them again.

"Her," she murmurs. "A play by..." Aza looks at me, her face half confusion half happiness. "No," she says. "No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

Her face is full happiness now. "They chose yours?" she says. "They chose your SAP-script?"

"Is it that surprising?"

"No, it's not."

"I even get to play. They already called and everything."

Aza just looks at me. If happiness was a picture, it would be the picture of her right now. It's my favourite picture; her, smiling, laughing, being happy. I would hang that picture up in my room. I would hang it up everywhere. It's a picture I want everyone to see. She hugs me, so tightly that I'm squeaking. Into my ear, she whispers, "I'm so, so proud of you."

In this moment, it seems impossible to me to feel happier. If I were able to travel back in time, this would be one of the moments I'd want to travel back to. I'd want to live this moment, over and over again. Just Aza and me, being happy, being as happy as we will never be again. Because soon, everything we have built up will start falling apart.