Hard

56 Auden

The paramedics put Linc in the back with his mom and dad beside him. I don't get a chance to say sorry to either of them for everything. 

Please be okay Linc! 

This isn't over for me! 

Please, I love you! 

Sutten and I are still wrapped in blankets as Jace talks with the captain. I watch them intensely, trying to figure out what they are saying. I feel completely shattered! We got in a fight and I sent him away! That is why this happened! If Linc dies then it will all be my fault. I love him so much and I am the reason he is being rushed off to the hospital in the first place. 

Sutten grips my arm tighter under the blanket and rests her head on my shoulders, "You didn't do this Auden." 

 I told her to leave too and she is carrying a baby. If Liam had killed her, or hurt the baby at all, that would have been my fault too! I put all the people I love in terrible danger just because I couldn't take the news of my parent's betrayal well. How the fuck did we even get here? Why would Liam do this to Linc if he wanted to hurt me? "I did this. If he dies..." 

"If he dies, it still wouldn't have been your fault. Liam did this! He did all of it! None of this had to happen, Liam just thought it did."

I look into her eyes and see the tears rushing down her face. Her hair is a wreck and her mascara is smudged under her eyes, "I need him to be okay Sutten."

She kisses my cheek and then moves the blanket so it is covering my legs, "We all do my love." 

Linc please be okay! 

Our time together has been short, chaotic, messy, and intense, but everything about you dared me not to fall in love with you- I failed. 

The plan wasn't to fall in love with him. I wasn't supposed to be this attached to someone so soon. I was supposed to live out my days alone and sulking, not trusting anyone with my heart again, but Linc walked straight into my heart and nurtured it. He has made me feel like I will be okay one day and that is the most beautiful thing I have ever come across. Love doesn't listen to your plans because it already has it's own. Even if I never get to hold him again, if he dies tonight, I know that I will never ever let him go. 

Jace and the captain walk over to me and Sutten. The captain begins to tell me something but his image is blurred in my head as I see Liam being walked to a police car. Suddenly, my anger takes over and I push off Sutten and rush to him. Nobody even notices that I am running to Liam at first but when they do Jace runs after me. He tells me to stop, he tells me no, he tells me a lot of things that I ignore. I am going to kill him! I am going to ruin him as he ruined me like he ruined Linc! 

Liam sees me coming and lunges out of the way just in time for me not to grab a hold of his neck and strangle him right here. Before I can attack again, Jace pulls me by my waist and then wraps both  of his arms around me so that I cannot escape, "NO LET ME GO!" 

"Damnit Auden stop it! This won't help!" 

Liam starts to laugh and my urge to rip him open consumes me but I am no match for Jace's strength. His arms get tighter and tighter until I can't even wiggle in his grip at all. "WHY DID YOU DO THIS? WHY DID YOU NEED TO HURT HIM? WHY NOT KILL ME?" 

I need to cry but I refuse to in front of him. I refuse to show him that he's killing me on the inside. He has taken too much from me to get that too. "Killing Linc was way more fun than hurting you ever was." Just like that, I stop fighting Jace. I lose all feeling in my body and fall to the ground but Jace picks me up immediately. Liam is past saving- he's evil. His laugh is filled with true happiness and I feel my stomach in knots. How could someone be so awful to another human? How could someone do this to someone else? How did any of this happen at all? "Nice to see you, James..."