We Are the Freaks

Chapter Ten

TW: A little bit of self depreciation, panic attack, description of someone in a flashback (does not go into detail on the flashback), suggestive past physical abuse and suggestive past self harm

Remy got out of the shower feeling a little better. He often has that dream and tonight was no different. He thought about the dream and his usual questions like why do I still have it or can't I just get over it? This is so frustrating! But his attention went to Virgil as he realized he wasn't back yet.

I wonder what Virgil's dream was of. Remy sat on the bed and scrolled through Tumblr for about half an hour before he put it down and looked up concerned. The door remained just as unopened as the last 30 minutes. Remy decided to give it another half hour and if he wasn't out by then, he'd go check up on him.

Half an hour later, Remy was hella concerned. He jumped out of bed and trotted up to the door, whipping it up and swiftly walking to the bathroom Virgil told Remy about. He found it with ease and knocked rapidly. There was no response but a whimper behind the door. Remy tried the door and was happy to find it unlocked though why Virgil had it unlocked was beyond him. Remy ran in and found Virgil curled up in the shower, tears running down his face. He was shivering violently. Remy whipped his hand under the shower and found it to be freezing. 

"Shhhh, Virgil, it's alright, calm down." Remy tried to touch his shoulder to try and ground him without thinking and Virgil flinched violently and tried to get away. His gaze was faraway and he didn't seem to register that it was Remy in front of him. When he touched him he started to whimper loudly.

"Please don't, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." he cried. Remy frowned at this and turned off the shower head quickly.

"Virgil shhh, it's not happening. You're at the palace, you're safe." Remy tried to soothe. He watched his friend suffer helplessly, whispering encouraging and grounding things in any attempt to calm him down. When Virgil had stopped muttering and his focus was coming back, Remy began to analyze his body. He had white or faded lines on his wrists and one of his shoulders had stitching on it. The rest of his body was littered in scars that indicated either self harm, abuse, or both and it made Remy's skin crawl. He could sympathize.

"Virgil... Honey. Can you hear me?" he asked softly. He shot Virgil a soft smile when he turned to look Remy in the eyes. He nodded slowly. Remy sighed in relief. "Can you stand?" he asked Virgil. Virgil looked down at his body and his already shaking body began to shake more if that was even possible. Tears poured again and Remy's eyes widened as he recognized the beginning of a panic attack.

"Y- you saw. G- god I'm so d- d- disgusting." he whispered. 

"No baby, you aren't disgusting. You-" Remy looked down. It wouldn't be too bad showing him. Maybe it'll help him calm down. Remy slowly took off his shirt with a shiver and spread out his arms. "Virgil, you aren't the only one. Baby, we are all scarred whether physically, mentally or both. You and I were some of the more unfortunate ones." Virgil's eyes scanned Remy's body. Old scars littered his body, just like Virgil. Remy thought he made the wrong choice when a sob tore through Virgil but was quickly enveloped in a tight hug.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry Remy." he cried into Remy's shoulder. Remy noticed how cold he was. He had been in that cold shower for at least 50 minutes.

"Shhh. You have nothing to be sorry about." A few tears escaped Remy as well but yet he smiled at the embrace. "Let's get you out of the shower, shall we?"