Ambience (Poetry Book 2)

What Do You Get Up in the Mornings For?

September 15th, 2019

"What gets you up in the morning?"

Distractions and idleness are very real

So is apathy.

It isn't to say my dreams and motivations are a lie or gone

Selfish satisfaction becomes first and the foreground stays still;

Comfortable and undisturbed in an illusionary nil.

The world carries on beyond my blinds and I'm aware

That the best, first, morning light has been missed

And the prime guitar hour has passed

But I'll be there- lying there

In the same place; in the same space

Breaking vows I'd made at the altar to soothe my alter ego's mundane pain at isolation.

Isolation...

Isolation because I lack societal pressure to keep me running again

Smiling again

When alone.

"What gets you up in the mornings?"

I remember my younger days just working like a clock; morning with the turn of the light and changing traffic signals

To jest and tearfully yawn when I meet the friends I came to learn and appreciate that I live for.

It was easy; it was easier then

Now, school is not the pressure and more internal force is called with maturity to get me up again

In the mornings.

It's not supposed to be this difficult.

It doesn't have to be.

But when you know that everything that exists is just a cog to your internal destiny- relevant and varying; but not intrinsically as vital as the calling in you...

It doesn't seem so easy anymore.

It makes sense.

...

"What wakes you up in the morning?"

I wanted to ask my younger sister as I saw her hurriedly leave the house to cater to her day's schedule. One of her puppies has been bought. She's also studying law.

I wanted to know how she gets up so early,

And what inspires her- motivates her to keep moving forward.

I need to do that.

And remember the vows I made

Remember what it means to feel the pain

And cry.

"What wakes you up in the morning?"

I wanted to ask my stepdad as I moved to prepare to take the kids to church.