My Villain

Chapter Twenty-Six

Last night with her girlfriends had been the first time she got drunk as an Irish man and she has earned the right to stay in bed for the whole day. Her brother is not going to ruin that for her.

"NO! Can't you let me sleep?!?", she asks, exasperated, "I'm hungover and happy about it. Please let me sleep."

"You won't be happy about that for long when your body screams for food and water so get up or I'll throw you in the shower and bathe you myself."

She knows the threat is not empty.

Her brother sometimes treats her like a five-year old.

"Can't I stew in the misery of a hangover? Can't I just stay in this room and allow myself to feel hungry and dehydrated? Can't I just... die?"

And there it is again.

The one thing she is trying to hold back – the anger, frustration, and hurt.

It sniffed the air and is going to come out now. Chin is sure. And it is going to come out while she is with her brother, the one man who she knows deserves to hurt just as much as she does.

"I won't allow you to die unless you die happy, Chin. And if you don't get up from bed now, that is not going to happen anytime soon!"

"Why are you acting like both our worlds were not destroyed?!?", she demands of him, "How could you act like you are not hurting as bad as I am?!?"

Kai hauls her up the bed and looks at her dead square in the eye. "Because I have to. I have to act like everything is going to be ok until it eventually becomes ok. And so do you. Some things you have to pretend about before the need to pretend goes away because you have already made it your reality."

The tears fell.

"But it's tiring to pretend", she croaks in between her sobs.

"It's more tiring to not be ok. We both have to begin somewhere, don't we?"

DiDi remembers this moment in time very well.

Zi Wei had come with him and Kido reluctantly but he tried his damnedest to make sure she would have fun.

However, what made him pause is that this scene made him look like a very caring brother.

It is not that THAT isn't true but the tone with which he has been written in here is very different from the tone used on him in the first book.

He remembers that he was still a very caring brother in that book but it sometimes felt like he was just using his concern for his sister to push his untoward agenda on Feiyu.

He was the ultimate villain in that book but it seems he won't be portrayed as a devil in this one.

He brought his eyes back to the story and continued to read.

He still had seven more chapters to go.

Is it possible that despite her treatment of him, she really doesn't hate him?

DiDi found himself going around this question even an hour after he read Yue's draft.

Something squeezed at his heart as he read about how his sister appreciated all the efforts he put in during those first few months after the tragedy that befell them.

Yes, Zi Wei had thanked him profusely herself, never shying away from letting him know how much she loves him for everything that he did and for what he continues to do for her.

Still, to read about it and have the memories refreshed, there was a certain happiness that had enveloped him in realizing that his sister's contentment now was a byproduct of him never giving up on at least one of them getting a happy ending.

And to also realize that the one who had written this is someone he hates and is planning to take down... unrest settled in the pit of his stomach.

Could Shen Yue really be writing this, not for profit, but because she wants to?

Could Shen Yue be saying the truth after all?

Could it be possible that he really is, indeed, an asshole blinded by anger?

He felt his chest constrict.

And then the memory of Shen Yue's face in his car, before they went down the restaurant for the engagement party, flashed inside his head.

It deeply bothered him how haunted it looked at the thought of seeing her best friend and the man she loves officially announcing their upcoming union.

Could it be possible that Yue is writing his sister's story because she, herself, wants to believe that there could be a chance for everyone to find love again?

Because if another person can find love then maybe she can too?

It was a heady thought too heavy for DiDi's state of mind but it pressed on.

He remembered every argument, every conversation, every snide remark they had thrown at each other and the way she shook in indignation when he accused her of writing for money stood out.

"I do not write for money MISTER WANG HE DI! And if you really are intelligent, you would know that if I wanted to get rich, I wouldn't be writing since there really is nothing to earn from writing."

He had taken that as an empty retaliation to make the author look like she really had a heart.

But what she had written down in her new book shows DiDi that indeed, this is a labor of love.

He took a deep breath.

Love victimized him the same way it had victimized her.

They hated each other because they didn't know just how much each of them suffered for love.

But he had seen her struggles and had taken advantage of them, even.

Why was he so blind to that?

And now... now that he knows and understands everything... what could he possibly do?

Something else is starting to replace the unrest he felt in his stomach.

If Wang He Di had not spent the last years being bitter and heart-broken, he would have recognized this new feeling as the one he felt when he was around seven years old and his father had him listen to a Beatle's song. He would have known that this is...