What I Expect

Interior Design

Okay so in uni.
A = 1st Class Degree.
B = 2:1 Degree (upper 2nd Class Degree).
C = 2:2 (lower 2nd Class Degree).
D = 3rd Class Degree.

This entire first week of November, Akefia is a hermit. He never leaves his room - not once, doesn't shower or eat or interact with me or even Melvin. I'm worried, so worried but Melvin assures me this is to do with his dissertation. Apparently he does this whenever exams come around, sacrifices himself for his grades. He has a lot of work to do if he's going to pass with more than a 3rd Class Degree. I understand, he has commitments to his studies. But I hate being shut out like this, just as we were getting close.

Today Yūgi brings home Yami, his boyfriend. I'm jealous, they got together so fast whereas I'm making no progress with Akefia. They hang out in the game shop and I observe them from afar, not wanting to be an awkward 3rd-wheel. They don't interact like Akefia and I. Yami plays video games and seems in constant competition with Yugi, who displays such passionate drive when they play a simple DS game against each other. They seem constantly at odds but underneath the rivalry they aren't. They talk about courses and relationships, they bounce off one another so well, their conversation compatible. Akefia and I are always in conflict, do I need to be the Yami to his Yugi to make it work?

I invite Mai over after class. It's her first visit to my bedroom, but for once I have the time and energy to do something with an actual friend. We climb the stairs to my bedroom and she looks around. "Small," she comments, but without judgement. Just a raw blunt truth, like how Mai does everything else. "It doesn't really scream 'Marik Ishtar',"

"Not my house," I remind her sadly. "I just rent the room,"

"True, but you're allowed to decorate! Buy your own sheets, repaint the furniture, get stickers. Do something to add some personality to this place!" Shes always been the perceptive and level headed one, I'm surprised she didn't remember what we discussed before. Is exam stress replacing me in her mind? Although she is still perceptive enough to know the lack of 'Marik Ishtar' in this room bothers me.

"No money," I remind her. Maybe after Christmas I'll look into changing stuff, especially if I get a bonus or money wired from Egypt for my birthday. "But you're right, I could do something to change it," I may not have decorations but I have jewellery. I have my Egyptian jewellery that belonged to my mother, some to my father. It's gathering dust in my suitcase so I bring it out.

Together Mai and I work like interior designers to arrange each piece for a purpose. The windowsill now has rings along it at regular intervals to project the colour of natural light form the window onto the back wall. Necklaces hang from the bedposts and upper curtains, shining gold. Yes, this feels more regal, it totally matches my personality. "This is impressive." I look around. "* know I'm complimenting us, but we did a good job!"

"Nothing wrong with complementing ourselves sweetheart," Mai winks at me in a confident 'well done' kind of way. The rest of her visit is spent discussing her love life and my lack thereof.

"What's happening with Valon anyway?" I ask. "Is Joey finally over being jealous?"

Mai bites her lip nervously "Well actually... he admitted he has feelings for me!"

"Valon?!" I gasp in genuine shock. "But you're-"

"I know," she groans mockingly. "It's so hard having boys fight over me,"

"Boo boo, at least someone actually want you," I roll my eyes. Mai chuckles.

"Honey, have you seen yourself? Even straight guys want you," she reasons, gesturing to my appearance. I understand I'm exotic, or something similar that makes me desirable, but I never think of anyone except Akefia like that. "You just think you aren't cause one guy said no to you. I mean, what so special about your roommate? Are you even his type?"

"No," I admit, feelings kind of defensive now. "This isn't some silly crush. I have genuine... feelings for him,"

"Hey Marik," I look up at her, she's fixating me worth an intense stare. I can't look away, trapped by the Harpies' talons. "Don't waste your life chasing someone who doesn't want to be caught,"

"I won't," I promise. But my promises only really mean something to Akefia. Otherwise I don't much care. "So how's everything with Joey?"

"Great!" Mai says enthusiastically, making me jealous once again. Being in a relationship so carefree and secure, it's frustrating to see everyone around me have that. Yet I can't, because I'm gay and the only other suitable man on the planet is apparently fucking impotent, or something. I mean why else would he not make a move on me? "He's still jealous of me and Valon but he can think what he wants,"

"But everything otherwise is fine?"

"Everything including the jealously is fine," she smiles. "He's told me he's jealous, I've told him I acknowledge that, but I'm serious about my friendship so I'm not breaking that off because Valon means a lot to me as a friend. It's called communication," I don't think I'd be able to handle my jealousy with Akefia. If he got a too-friendly friend I'd end up stabbing the bitch.

"Now!" Mai claps her hands with a grin. "We gotta do something about how bare your walls are," surveying them I have to agree. White, bland, but I like a sophisticated look. Not some college-dorm shit-sthetic with ripped band posters and comic strips stuck on with glue. That's Akefia's thing. I get an idea.

"What about gold framing?" I ask, picturing the wall framed across the ceiling and corners in a sparkling gold paint.

"I love that!" Mai agrees. "And you can make it shiny and besparkled and add sequins or whatever you want!"

"I'll go downstairs and ask Yūgi if it's okay - and if he has any paint," he seems the type that just has paint.

He does, and soon we're carefully finishing the edges with tape to make them straight, equal and perfect. Tearing off the tape and pulling back, Mai and I stand back, grinning as we survey our masterpiece. I must say I'm impressed with myself. For the rest of the night we lounge on my floor, lazily studying between breaks of gossip. This is something I'd love to do with Akefia but I'm happy I'm doing it with Mai.

Unfortunately, once it passes into night time she stands up, shrugging on a coat over her midriff-and-chest exposing top. "See ya tomorrow,"

"Aw you're leaving?" I sigh. I prefer people in my room, maybe because I had siblings. I don't do great on my own.

"Sorry - I actually have a life," she laughs then shakes her head. "In all seriousness, I have to get back. I'm staying with Joey tonight,"

"Aww okay, have fun!" I wave her off at my door.

"Trust me honey, I will," She turns and blows me a kiss, sending a wink my way too. I grin as she leaves, sitting back on my bed, now comfortably alone. Alone, but not isolated.

At this point, Akefia appears in my doorway. He wrinkles his nose and stares around the room. "Gay," he huffs  before going downstairs.

So I've realised something. This story will be 30-40 chapters maybe more. And I don't want to spend the next 9 months writing it. So now my exams are over I'm going to be aiming to update this every 4-5 days.