Vulnerability

~7~

The alarm on my phone causes vibrations to ripple under my stomach as I'm sleeping face down with drool pooling in my mouth, almost spilling out onto my pillow. I quickly suck it back in, becoming more conscious and immediately grab my phone to stop the horrid noise from continuing any longer. It is 6:45 p.m. on a Saturday, but not just any other Saturday.

Saturday, the day of our first official date. I could act all nonchalant about it but the unwarranted beating of my heart as I arise, doesn't allow me.

To say I'm nervous is quite a bit of an understatement as it is the first time anyone has shown enough interest in me to take me out. Like in public, for everyone to see that I'm with them. It's insane.

It feels extremely weird but satisfying at the same time. It makes me feel as though I matter to someone in a weird, contorted way.

I finally build up enough courage to revive myself from the power nap I just had and head straight to the bathroom to brush my teeth to rid myself of the tuna breath that still lingered. Tuna sandwiches are great but the smell mingled in with hot breath is not.

After brushing my teeth, I attempt to find something to wear but all my closet consists of are oversized t-shirts and hoodies, with a variety of jeans mingled in. Those are the only articles of clothing I trust to cover up the love handles I so adamantly despise.

"What the hell, Jules?" I question myself out loud, as I realize I have absolutely nothing to wear for tonight.

I rub my temples trying to initiate some thought as to how I can solve this issue. All of a sudden, I'm hit with an epiphany. I know the only person that can help me in this situation so I grab my phone and slip on my black and white Nike slides.

My tall figure travels stealthily to the dorm room directly across from mine and knocks, desperately hoping that she is there. I wait anxiously for a few seconds, fearing that someone might spot me in the hall looking like the hot mess that I am.

"Jules!" She squeals as she yanks open the door to see me. Hugging is usually her first instinct so I'm not completely shocked when her arms naturally wrap themselves around me, trapping me in the tightest embrace I've ever been in.

"Hey, Steph," I reply, simply rubbing her back with my hand since my arms are limited in their range due to her restriction. I attempt to reciprocate her feelings of excitement as I enter her shared dorm.

Stephanie is one of the only friends I've made in Orlando for the short time that I've been here. She has helped me navigate around crazy-ass Florida after I met her through working at the campus bookstore. She took me under her wing since this is her second year at USO. I find a bit of solace in Stephanie because she is so outgoing and has really been there for me the many times I've fallen homesick.

"What's up, finally got some dick?" She states sarcastically, sticking her tongue out at me in a teasing manner. Her transitions into conversations never seem to phase me anymore.

I don't reply, still unsure about this whole thing between me and Victor. My eyes divert their attention to the stiff beige carpeted flooring and instinctively, my fingers start fidgeting around one another like they always do.

"Oh, my gosh, you really did get some dick!" She exclaims after gasping. Her hands clasp together as her eyes widen at me in awe and admiration. Her fuchsia, loosely-curled hair, bounces alongside her exaggerated reaction.