After (Camren)

Chapter 60

"Okay, now tell me who you fought with, was it Hayley?" I ask, afraid of her answer. I sit down at the end of the bed and she follows me, sitting towards the headboard.

"No, it wasn't Hayley. It was just a few random guys." She replies. Oh, I had assumed it was Hayley, I am relieved that it wasn't. 

"Wait, a few? How many?"

"Three.. or four. I am not really sure." She laughs.

"It's not funny, why were you fighting anyway?"

"I don't know.. I was pissed that you left with Hayley and it seemed like a good idea at the time." She shrugs.

"Well it's not a good idea, and now look how busted up you are." I frown and she cocks her head to the side with a puzzled expression. "What?"

"Nothing.. come here." She says and holds her arms out to me. I move across the bed and sit in front of her, between her legs. 

"I am sorry for the way I treated.. well treat you." She says quietly into my ear. A shiver runs through my body from her breath in my ear and her unforced apology.

"It's okay, well it's not okay. But I am going to give you one more chance." I tell her. I hope she doesn't make me regret it. I don't think I can handle anymore hot and cold from her. 

"Thank you, I know I don't deserve it. But I am selfish enough to take it." She says, her mouth against my hair and wraps her arms around me. To sit with her like this feels foreign and nostalgic at the same time.

When I stay silent she turns my shoulders slightly to have me look at her. "What's wrong?" She asks.

"Nothing, I am just afraid that you will change your mind again." I admit. I want to dive into this head first, but I am afraid I will hit the bottom.

"I won't, I have never changed my mind. I just fought my feelings for you. I know you can't trust me but I want to earn your trust. I won't hurt you again." She promises and leans her forehead against mine.

"Please don't." I beg. I don't care how pathetic I sound.

"I love you, Camila." She breathes and my heart leaps out of my chest. The words sound perfect coming off of her lips and I would do anything to be able to hear them again.

"I love you, Lauren." This is the first time we have both openly said the words, I fight down my urge to panic over the idea that she may take them back again. Even if she does, I will always have the memory of how they sounded, how they made me feel.

'Say it again." She whispers and turns me around to face her. Her eyes are more vulnerable than I thought possible for her as I move to my knees, between her legs. I take her face in my hands and rub my thumbs over her perfect jaw. I can tell by her expression that she needs me to say it, over and over again. I will say it as many times as I have to until she believes that she is worthy of someone loving her.

"I love you." I repeat and cover her lips with my own. She hums in appreciation as her tongue grazes gently over mine. Kissing Lauren feels new and different each time, and she is like a drug that I can't get enough of. Her hands press against the small of my back, bringing our chests together. My mind is telling me to take it slow, to kiss her gently and to savor each second of this gentle calm between us. But my body is telling me to grab a fist full of her hair and pull her shirt over her head. Her lips travel down my jaw, and attach themselves onto my neck. That does it, I can't control myself anymore. This is us, all anger and passion and now love.

An involuntary moan escapes my lips and she groans against my neck, grabbing my waist and flipping us over so she is hovering over me. "I..have..missed you.. so much." She says in between sucking the skin on my neck. I can't keep my eyes open, it feels too good. She unzips my jacket and looks down at me with hungry eyes. She doesn't ask for my permission before tugging at the fabric, pulling my tank top up and over my head and she sucks in a sharp breath as I arch my back so she can unclasp my bra.