izzy. // ybnfuneral

one

isaiah

"oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me...." i mumbled under my breath, peering sideways to my large window.

across the street, there was house that was for sale, but it was sold just last weekend and now, i see the moving trucks and the people who were going in and out of the house with boxes.

one of those people just had to be the annoying nicholas santana.

"are you serious right now?" i grumbled again. getting up from my queen size bed, i stalked over the window and stood against the wall, making sure i wasn't visible from where i stood. i continued to stare out the window and watch him pick up a heavy-looking box in nothing but a white short-sleeved shirt that revealed the sleeves of tattoos he sported on his arms, and simple, black joggers.

i internally groaned. annoyingly handsome, that is.

around the time that high school started,  i had taken notice that nick had a sort of, distaste, for me and i still don't know why. almost everyday, without fail, he would snicker or guffaw if i happened to walk past him, or whisper something to someone whenever i happened to be sitting or standing near him or just shoot me dirty looks whenever he could. there was barely a time where he ever said anything directly to me, and he sure as hell never put his hands on me, so it's not really bullying, but he seems to have this hateful attitude towards me and it's hurtful that he feels that way about me when i've never done anything to him.

like, i deadass stay in the woodworks and he just always has to take subtle jabs at me for whatever reason he has.

i've always had an issue with making "friends"  and didn't have an abundance of them-- matter of fact, i didn't really have friends at all, except the occasional acquaintance, chris, who hangs around with nick sometimes too, so i don't talk to him much either.

high school was brand new playing field, and i was worried sick to my stomach about what would happen over the next four years and i didn't want to have terrible experiences like those people in teen novels, or high school rom-coms, or even in wattpad books. so, as the first day of highschool began, i kept to myself because, duh, it was the first day. but days turned to weeks, weeks molded into months,  i still haven't spoken a word to anyone and no one had said a thing to me.

except for chris. at least he has some decency.

but because of his appearance and outgoing personality, he was swept away by the crowd, and everyone soon admired him, and often left me alone. sure, there were plenty of times where he would invite me to places, or to sit with him at lunch, but i just couldn't. i excessively worried about how other people would feel about some guy they've never seen before suddenly start to hang around them. i worried a lot about what i would say, how i would keep up conversation and deeply feared that they wouldn't like me.

so i kept to myself. for as long a i can remember. i hated criticism or even the slightest rejection of any kind so i stayed away from most people to avoid it. i've gotten terribly lonely, but i always thought it was better than someone criticizing or talking about me in a negative way.

i peered again outside the window, trying to be discreet, watching a man in a jumpsuit have a woman sign a clipboard and the man getting into the truck and leave the house. one by one after that, each truck left until there were none left.