It's Okay, I Like Different [Destiel]

Six Months Later: Stay

Dean sits at Castiel's desk, sniffling around the drawers and flipping through the pages of his textbooks, careful not to lose the page Cas was on. He has no idea what has gotten into Cas, why he has just left on him so suddenly like this. Come to think of it, Cas hasn't really been acting up recently. Only a few mishaps here and there. Dean thought they were just bad days; just days when there were midterms (it's the most wonderful time of the year) and other major tests. Normally on those days, Cas would take a walk and make his way back to the apartment before long, but he never acted out like he did today.

Dean gives up. He calls Cas again and again, never leaving messages, knowing they're pointless.

Finally, Dean leaves a message.

"Cas, Angel. I... I understand if - if you need space, or whatever. I just," Dean laughs a little, trying to cheer himself up, "See what you do to me? I can't talk. Anyway, please just call me. I love you. Please, I know that school is stressful and I have no idea what's gotten between us but I love you and I need you in my life and I don't really know what I'd do without you, to be honest, and now I'm just rambling on and I really, really love you." A long pause ensues. "Ah, bye, I guess."

Dean squeezes his eyes shut. Why did Cas walk out on him like that?

Dean pulls out his headphones and turns it up to full blast, shutting out the world around him. He lays down on their bed and closes his eyes, accepting Luna sitting on his chest and cleaning herself up.

~

A few hours later, Dean hears the apartment door open. He must have fallen into an excruciatingly restless sleep, considering that his headphones are across the room along with his iPod, Luna is in a ball in one corner of the room, and the sheets are scattered everywhere.

Dean quickly stands up to see who he's expecting.

"Cas?"

"Hello, Dean," Cas mumbles, looking towards the ground. Dean realizes that it's now dark outside.

"Where have you been?" Dean asks Cas.

"Out," is all Dean gets before Cas lightly pushes past him to their room. Castiel only gets a few feet farther and then stops, turning around.

Cas opens his mouth as if he's going to say something long and meaningful, but quickly closes it and only gives a quiet "Sorry," before going straight to their room.

The door is opened slightly, so Dean can see Cas staring in awe at the accidental mess he made while he was dead asleep. Cas doesn't do much. He gathers up the sheets and pillows and throws them on the bed, tucking the comforter in last and turning off the light.

Dean watches him the whole time.

After a few minutes of standing in the same place, Dean heads into the room to get a pillow to sleep on the couch. He notices that Cas is awake and watching him, so he sits down on the bed.

"Cas," Dean breathes. "I don't know what's going on."

"I know," Cas says, his voice an octave higher than usual.

"Do... do you want to taco-bout it?"

Cas laughs a little, situating his head higher on his pillow. "I don't really wanna taco-bout it right now. I'm nacho best person to talk to about these kinds of things."

Dean giggles, actual noise coming out of his mouth, not just slightly higher-pressured air. "That was a good one. Although I guess I'll stop getting jalapeño business."

Cas suddenly goes silent. "I'm sorry. It's not your fault. It's not you at all," Cas pauses for a minute. "I overreacted."

"It's okay. I'll just sleep on the couch tonight." Dean starts to stand up, but is quickly interrupted by a tight grip around his wrist.

"No. Stay."

Dean is hesitant laying down on their bed, which, after today, does not seem like their bed anymore. It seems like last time they kissed was years ago.

He finally fixes himself next to Cas like he always does, Cas' head on his shoulder and one arm dominantly around Cas' shoulders. It all feels unfamiliar, but Dean is determined to make it feel normal again. He leans down to kiss Cas lazily, and Cas surrenders temporarily.

"Dean, I'm tired," Cas whines.

"Go to sleep now," Dean starts before hitching a breath and calling Cas by his nickname, "Angel."

Cas gets himself comfortable against Dean. He nuzzles his face into Dean's chest, letting one arm fall over his abs and the other by Dean's hair, slowly stroking it.

"We'll talk tomorrow. I need a minute." Cas' voice cracks at the end, almost like he's going to cry, but Dean pushes it aside, enjoying the actuality that he has closure. He knows Cas isn't directly mad at him, now, which secures him. Kind of. But it hurts Dean to know that Cas actually walked out on him, indirectly angry at Dean, because of something that happened in his life in the past few days.