It's Okay, I Like Different [Destiel]

You're Pretty Hot. Especially You're Lungs

~Dean's POV~

Fire. There's fire burning in my lungs, washing in and out of my body as I let out gasps for pure oxygen. The pain is unbearable, not letting me take a break from it.

Between chokes, I whisper Cas' name. Why won't he wake up? The one time I need him.

In, out. In, out. In, out. Breathe.

I can't. The flames are grinding up against my throat, begging to be released into the air.

"CAS!" I manage to yell.

"What?! WHAT! Dean, are you okay? Dean!"

Sam comes running in with Gabe and he doesn't stop to ask me what's wrong.

In, out. In, out. In, out. Breathe.

I am going unconscious. I fight to keep myself awake so my Angel doesn't have to be alone for one minute.

I fight to keep myself awake so Sam never has to grieve over me.

I fight to keep myself awake so Gabriel never has to see Sam in pain.

In, out. In, out. In, out. Breathe.

I feel someone lift me up and run down the stairs. When I look up, I see Sam, calmly running out the door as towards the Impala. I look to my side and see pure panic on Castiel's face, tears streaming down his face.

I fight through the flames riding up my throat to say, "I love you, Angel."

I think I hear him say "I love you" back.

In, out. In, out. In, out. Breathe.

The last thing I see is Gabriel climb in the front seat of the Impala.

~Cas' POV~

"DEAN!" I yell, like it would help. Dean is lying there, in a pool of his own vomit, gasping for air. "Cas," he screeches. "Help."

"SAM!" I scream, hoping he hears. I know I should call 911 but there isn't a phone near, so I try to pick him up. I can't. I am too weak. The pain is too strong. So I just hold his face with one hand, trying to move him off the bed with the other.

Sam runs in the room with Gabriel and Sam doesn't stop to wonder what is going on, so he motions for Gabriel to help pick Dean up. As we're going down the stairs, the panic sets in and I start to sob. As if to comfort me, Dean catches eyes with me for a split second before closing his eyes and whispering, "I love you, Angel," before dissolving in another coughing fit.

We run down the stairs and out the front door, not even bothering to shut it. We slide Dean into the backseat so he is laying down and I go in after him. Sam drives us to the emergency care.

"Dean, I love you, okay? You're gonna be okay. I love you, this will end, do you hear me?"

I try my best to keep Dean awake so he doesn't suffocate, but towards the end of the car ride he gives up just as I do. He keeps coughing ever so slightly, but he is unconscious. Sam runs into the emergency room with Dean in his arms and yells for help. All I can do is sob and scream. I feel weak; helpless.

Once Dean is taken into the emergency room, Gabriel opens his arms to offer me a hug. After about five minutes of me sobbing onto his shoulder, he pushes me away and tells me that everything will be okay. After a while, Sam takes a break from pacing and sits down next to Gabriel. They hold hands after a while. They hold them so tight that their knuckles turn white. I can't help but be jealous of the affection.

~

After a long time, a doctor comes out to talk to the three of us with a concerned look on his face.

"We gave him oxygen and everything else we could. His heart rate remains steady at the moment and coughing is at a minimum, but we have diagnosed him with Stage I Lung Cancer." he says it with a disappointed smile, like everything could be fixed with a snap of his fingers. "We're going to try radiation right away. Now, Stage I is controllable, so don't think any negative thoughts yet. We will put him on medication as soon as he leaves the hospital."

I don't know what to think. My Dean, now not so strong. My Dean. How dare cancer even lay a finger on my Dean.

"Thank you," Sam says.

A few minutes later, Gabriel breaks the silence by saying, "I'm going to go back home to get some stuff to do. I'll also stop at McDonald's on the way. Do you guys want anything?"

"Yeah, could you get. . ." Sam starts. I stop paying attention. All I can think of is Dean, Dean the Strong, Dean the Courageous, Dean with lung cancer.

"Cassie? Do you want anything?" I don't say anything for a few seconds, and I tell him to bring me back The Fault In Our Stars, because Dean quoted it on the first day we met.

"It's on the nightstand by my bed," I say, my words slurred.

"Okay," Gabe says.

After Gabriel leaves, Sam finally says, "Jesus, I should call Bobby and Ellen. They're probably at a casino having the time of their lives. Little do the know I'm about to ruin their night."

I don't reply.

And I am not about to deny myself the simpler pleasures of existence.

And now I realize that Dean Winchester is my Hazel Grace Lancaster.