Disasterology ✞Luke Hemmings✞

Chapter 48- I Blame Myself

Is it because you know my name

Or is it because you saw my face on the cover?

Either way it's all the same

It's like talking to a friend

Who's trying to be your lover

It was officially seven days until the tour was over. Luke and I had barely spoken a word to each other and we couldn't even look at each other for more than ten seconds. I had planned on going home a few times but I needed to wait until we got to Miami. I'd been sharing a bed with Ashton and the room with him and Michael since the day Luke and I got into a fight. I currently had an I Blame Myself cover by Kelsey Snowdon playing from my laptop as I scrolled down my Facebook feed.

"You're boring," Ashton told me then threw himself onto the bed beside me.

"Well there's nothing else to do," I said not taking me eyes off the screen.

"We could go and walk around," he suggested.

"I hurt my knee remember?"

This was true. Ashton and I had been out for a run when I tripped and stuffed my knee. I had a compression sock on it and it was covered partly by my knee length, denim shorts.

"You can still walk," he told me with an eye roll.

"It hurts to walk retard," I sassed and he chuckled. "Do you think I should end it with Luke?"

I heard Ashton choke on either his saliva or the air he was breathing it, "what?"

"I mean, it's not like we act like a couple anymore anyway," I shrugged.

"It would be awkward though...wouldn't it?" he asked hesitantly.

"Couldn't be worse than how awkward it is now," I admitted and he nod in understanding. "So?"

"But you love him don't you?" he asked, suddenly becoming more serious.

"I guess but his behavior is seriously pissing me off. He obviously doesn't love me as much anymore either"

"He loves you a whole lot Brooklyn," Ashton said.

"Doesn't seem like it," I said then went back to my laptop.

He shut the lid on me and I knitted my eyebrows together in confusion at him, "why'd you do that?"

"Why do you want to end things with Luke? Do you have someone else you want to date?" I could see slight hope on his face and I had no idea why it was there.

"No, not really. Why?"

"I just want to know why you want to break up with Luke is all," he told me and I nod slowly.

"What do you think I should do?"

"Do what you think is right. If you're not happy then why put yourself through anymore pain then necessary?" I looked at him for a few seconds then his advice finally processed.

"Yu know what? You're right Ashton. Thanks," I said then got off the bed and walked out of our room. I knocked on the other boy's door and Calum answered, "is Luke here?"

"Yeah," he said then let me in.

"What do you want?" Luke deadpanned.

"I need to talk to you," I told him.

"Can it wait?"

"It's urgent"

"It better be," I heard him mutter and that set alight the fire in my veins.

I barely gave him time to shut the door before I began, "you're a dick"

"And?"

"I wasn't finished. You're a dick and I don't like it. So I'm ending it Luke. No more us, no more having to pussyfoot around your stupid fans and no more having to put up with you treating me like crap. Our relationship isn't working and I'm tired of being with someone who won't even put in the effort to talk to me and try and solve things. So I'm done. You get to do whatever you want. Kiss whoever you want without me being there to get upset. I'm not going home though. I'm going to enjoy this next week and make it worth it. Problem?" he stood there in stunned silence. "No? ok. Oh! And I'm going to need my sleeping pills from you. Don't want to Burdon you with having to look after them anymore. I don't need them anyway. I've actually been sleeping on my own for a change," I said then smiled.

He opened his mouth to speak but closed it before he said anything. He gestured for me to follow him so I did. All I got was a 'here' when he handed me the bottle and that was it. I smiled to him then returned to my room.

"And?" Ashton asked.

I let out a happy sigh, "I feel like this massive weight has been removed from my shoulders," I smiled.

"That's good," he said with an equally big smile.

"Wanna watch a movie?"

His smile turned cheeky, "thriller?"

"Wouldn't have it any other way," I said then jumped onto the bed and he found Netflix.