(don't) Give Up {boyxboy}

Chapter 20

Vic POV

I hate myself. I hate myself for making him this way. I seriously need to make it up to him. Here I am having the sweetest boyfriend he put is all to make sure I'm ok, and happy, then I make him feel like shit. He deserve better than me.

I watched him peacefully as he stirred, sleeping, into my lap. I don't want to make his life hell, like mine.

It just has to be done...

I let a tear slip my eyes,

"Vic? What's wrong? what happened?" Kellin shot up from my lap,

"K-Kellin" I breathed out, shakingly,

"What's wrong?"

"I think.... I think it would be best if," I bit my lip, "if you're better off without me"

"What? No!"

"I-I can't, look what I've done to you" tears flowed from my eyes,

"No please, I need you here. Please, forget about what happened, you're the best thing that ever happened to me" his voice cracked,

"But I can't forget what I've done"

"Hey, it's ok, I'm fine" he cupped my face, pecking my lips.

"Please don't leave me like this..." he pleaded,

"I just don't want you to keep getting hurt by me"

"It's all part of an relationship Vic, we learn from our mistakes ok? We'll work this out ok?" His eyes shown sad, desperate, maybe hope, but mostly scared. I nodded in response, he sighed in relief.

"God dammit, you fucking scared me..." he warped his arms around my neck,

"I just thought... nevermind"

"I don't want you to go, not when I'm like this- wait no, shit there I go again" he unwrapped himself from me, crying into his hands,

"What again?"

He kept crying, "I don't know what's wrong with me. You're right, I always think about me,"

This is the most I've ever seen him cry and I hate it. I was the one who started it, I'll have to fix it...

"Here come on" I took his hand, grabbing my keys and wallet, and running out the house.

"Where are we going?" Kellin hopped into the passenger side,

"It's where I go to take my mind off things" I said, simply knowing where to go. The woods. The last time I've been there, I almost killed myself there, but things are good....if I don't get to carried away.

We reach and we sat in front if a big tree, staring up into the sky.

"Hey Vic?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm sorry,"

"About what?" I started panicking,

"For everything that happened" he was stating the fact about Mike being dead- and mama.

"Who would've thought I'd be attending their funeral instead the other way around" tears rushed out,

"It's going to be ok" he cuddled right beside me

"How are we even going to get the money for their funeral?" my voice was shaky,

"Ermmmmm.... maybe you can sing to raise money?"

"Oh god no, singing in front of people isn't my thing"

"How else are we going to get the money?"