The whoosh sound the remote control made as it flew past her made her gasp. It missed her by luck. One wrong step to the left and her cheek would be red and swollen or worse. "Hey!" She yelled at Darin. "I told you to give it to me not throw it!"
"Shut up." Was his only retort.
Lacey stumped her way over to him and shoved him. "It almost hit me."
"So?"
"It's my turn to watch what I want and you tried to kill me. I wish you broke the remote. Then mum and dad would be mad at you." She shoved him again.
"Go away."
"Make me." She folded her arms, glaring at him, he glared right back. "I dare you."
Marvin clicked his tongue from the corner of the den where he sat talking to his girlfriend over the phone. "Hey, gimme a second okay? I need to take care of something." He looked at the pair having a glaring stand off.
"Are you joking?" The girl asked.
He scoffed. "No. I'm not. Just gimme a sec." He placed the phone on his shoulder and went to them. "Cut it out." He ordered.
Lacey broke her eyes away. "But Darin threw the remote at me. It could have hit me." She reported.
"I don't care."
"I wish you broke it." She repeated.
Darin opened his mouth to speak. Marvin's voice was louder. "Cut it out. Or I'll break it and tell mom you both did it."
"But Darin-"
"Sit down and watch the television or I swear..." his warning ended there. Lacey was the first to take her seat with a loud sigh of defeat. Satisfied, Marvin was back in his corner and back on the phone.
Panicking, Nick had scrambled out the elevator before it closed. Running after her. But she seemed to be moving too fast for him. Before he could get to her, her car was driving off. Damn it. But that was hours ago. And since then he hadn't heard a word of or from her. He went on a search. But no one knew where she was. And if they did and didn't tell him then there was some sort of loyalty from her employees that was... something else.
He'd never felt this way before. Not when he was in school and did something so wrong he was sure the next thing the principal would tell him was expulsion... Not that he was ever expelled. He couldn't compare this to him being in trouble with his parents either. This was worse. He felt sick to his stomach while the endless possibilities of what was to come raced through him like a speeding bullet. There he was in the living room while Marvin beat Darin in some video game and Lacey watched. But he couldn't. His legs kept moving rapidly... up down... up down... up down. His head down cast.
The slight sound of any door opening had him looking up thinking it was her. He knew what the front door sounded like when it was being opened. But this time he was deaf to that particular sound. The slightest sound got to him. He could imagine her... see her walk through the front door but she wasn't coming. It had even grown dark out. He couldn't stand it. Was this another form of punishment? Toss him divorce papers and leave him to decide his own fate? It felt familiar too. Quincy did it to her when she found out she was pregnant. She'd told him that Quincy sent her home and showed up later when he was ready. She was doing that to him now too. He ran his hand through his hair. He jolted up. It was just the kitchen door, Perdita had walked through. He let out a breath to calm himself. It wasn't working. Not in the slightest.
Divorce. His heart skipped a beat at the word. He didn't want that. He didn't want to live without her. He couldn't. She was his breath and his heart. He needed her. He loved her. How crazy is it that she found out the day he decided to stop? No it had to have been sooner if she had papers. Damn it. And she didn't speak. Not a word for who knows how long. His head fell to his hands. What in the world was happening? The kisses before work. The little smiles and he didn't see it. How would he even explain this to her? He cheated. What is... was his reason for cheating?
"Dad." Darin called for the fourth time before Nick heard him. He wasn't playing anymore. It was Lacey and Marvin and Marvin was helping her.
He looked at Darin with hooded eyes. "What?"
"What's wrong?" He looked too pale, almost sickly. Someone had to notice.
"Nothing. Go back to your game." He should be upstairs. But he wanted to be close when she came back. She would, wouldn't she?
He heard the car pull up. He almost sprang up to his feet. He hadn't cared about cars pulling up before. He had to stay calm. Maybe the driver was alone. But he was having a hard time sitting down now. The door he was waiting for to open finally did. He was up before her foot stepped through the threshold. He reached her just as she entered fully. "Lucille." Not a word or a look from her. Her arm like a hook holding her hand bag as she walked past him towards the stairs. "Luce." No look. "Lucille. Cilley." He followed desperately like a lost dog. Praying. Don't let me lose her. It was worse now. He couldn't tell what she was thinking. "Lucille. Cilley talk to me. Where were you?" Nothing. "Say something." She started up the stairs.
Marvin handed Darin his controller and was suddenly swept up in an obvious desperation from his father. Were they fighting? This is new.
"I was worried. I thought maybe- were you with someone else?"
That got her attention. It was like now that he knows she knows, she was so much angrier. He could feel the rage burning through her. She dumped her bag. It made a sound that startled the children. Only Marvin kept his eyes on them. He watched his mother turn around. The look in her face was like nothing he'd ever seen before. Like the unveiling of a monster. Her monster. "Is that what you want Nick?!" Now Lacey and Darin turned.
She was itching to hit him, and not just once. But instead. "Perdita!" The nanny came running. The sound of her own name scared her. What could have caused that? Lucille turned to the lady. "Take the children out."
Perdita was confused. "But it's dark out."
"Take them out Perdita. Now." Nick repeated much calmer.
Still confused. "But it's-"
Lucille wasn't about to start controlling her anger. "Then take a drive. Get some ice cream or some - bloody - thing!" Perdita was out the door with the children in less than a minute
Marvin didn't like what was going on. Once the door clicked behind them he stopped. "Come on Marvin."
"No." He stated plainly.
"Your parents said-"
"I don't care what they said. I'm not going anywhere." She tried to grab him. "Trust me when I say I'll get you fired. Others have been fired for much less."
"If you're staying I'm staying." Darin declared. Perdita grabbed him and into the car, they left.
Back to the question she had asked Nick. "Is that what you want?! For me to go be with someone else... even things out?!"
He didn't want to picture it. "No." He squeezed his face.
"Are you sure?"
"Completely." She turned away and continued up the stairs as he replied, he followed after her.
She'd gone to one of her hotels and instructed the receptionist to tell anyone who came looking for her that she wasn't in. That included Nick because she knew he would show up. Only because she couldn't leave the city. Runaway to Richie's house like she wished she could. She'd sat there and laid there in the pent house suite to avoid what was inevitable all the while consumed with an anger that had no place to be channelled because it's prey was the person she was running from. After hours of trying to drown out everything she felt all at once, suprisingly, it was working until she realised she would have to face him eventually. That prompted her to grab her hand bag and leave. It was no form of punishment.
She slammed the door on him and locked it to keep him away from her. She flung her bag, it missed the bed. She raked her hands through her hair, pacing and hearing him call her name over and over again while knocking on the door. The fury within her was more than she could stand. It yearned to burn it's victim completely and without remorse. She turned around and opened the door. Hitting him across the face. One. "How dare you?!" She hit him again. Two. "Why?" The tears in her eyes visible. She knew he could see them. The horrid yet hurt look on his reddened face was proof enough. "I've been racking my Brian around it for weeks." Weeks? Oh god. "Trying to understand to find out what I must have done wrong to make you go out and-" She couldn't complete it. "The flight attendant?" She hit him again. Three. "Why?"
"Lucille-"
"You flew around with her. It must have been some real friendly skies." It occurred to her. "Our children were on the plane with you while you fooled around with her. Our children Nick! You were with her, and then you'd come home and be with me. You disgust me." She stopped talking. Tears streaming down her face she didn't bother to wipe them off. Nick stood there. She scoffed. "I was there. I was with you and you were with her. You couldn't even hide it."
"No Luce. It was never while you were with me."
"So it was just the kids then?" She pushed past him. "Out of my way!" And headed down the stairs. Again he followed.
Marvin ran and squatted behind a chair to hide from them. He thought maybe he had done something. One of his pranks gone wrong and this was all his fault but the more he heard the more he understood and was shocked. Why had his father done that? And the flight attendant? Was it the really pretty one on the Atkins jet? He hadn't really been on the Lawes company jet recently so it had to be... Thelma? And he had been there? His eyes followed them into the kitchen.
"Lucille I'm sorry. I'm so terribly sorry. I- I ended things with her."
"Oh?!" Again she faced him, standing by the sink with dirty dishes Perdita must have left when she called for her.
"I knew it was wrong. I didn't want to do that to you anymore so I ended things."
Her hand dove into the sink. "You ended things?!" A mug in hand for a slight second before it crashed by his feet. She went for another one. His eyes widened. "Too late Nick!" She threw it. It felt more like a reflex than just blind rage. But she was blinded by rage. "Do you know how I found out Nick? Do you?" She looked around. There was a bouquet directly before an open window. She went for it. "Your stupid flowers!" She pulled it out of the vase and hit him with it continuously. He closed his eyes and blocked the hits with his two raised arms covering is face. "Your stupid stupid stupid flowers!" She stopped when all the petals were on the floor and she was out of breath. She sobbed loudly. Oh god he couldn't take it. This was all his doing. He hated himself. "Do you remember when you got me that bouquet? You said roses for this, hyacinths for that and blah blah blah." She looked at him. "You were apologising for leaving me alone. You wanted a fresh start."
What did she mean by that? Marvin couldn't help wondering. "You were sending me fresh start and apology flowers for months. You wanted me to know. You let yourself get caught."
That wasn't it. He couldn't let her think that. "No. Lucille it wasn't like that."
"I knew what you were like before I married you Nick. I basically worked for you remember? All the girls, the older women." She smiled and sniffed. "All the drama." She paused. "But I guess you've tried right? Ten years. Twelve if you count dating." She didn't see him shaking his head... she didn't care. "You've put in a lot of time with me. You've tried."
Oh no. She did mean the divorce. "Lucille please no. I'm sorry. I didn't- I wasn't thinking. I-" Say something you doomed fool!
"You weren't thinking for months? Come on Nick. You were sneaking around!" The whole world could have heard that yell. "And you weren't thinking? So you woke up this morning and you could think again suddenly? That's your reason?" She laughed. "No."
"Lucille please no. I don't want to lose you. I'm so sorry." He went to her. Reached for her but she stepped away. One more try and she was hitting him. Four five six seven... "I love you so much. I can't be without you. I know I've hurt you."
"No you don't. No you don't know what you've done. Watching you for days while you went on business trips. Knowing who you would be with... At first I thought maybe he had an accident with my car or something else. But I watched you hoping you'd say something and then finding out that you were cheating on me was-" She let out a shaky breath. "And you have the guts to ask me if I was with someone else." She looked into his eyes as she said that last part. " I wasn't Nick. I'm not you. I would never do that to you because I love you. But clearly you don't love me."
"I do love you. You're my best friend, my everything and I love you. I ended things. I promise it won't happen again. It never will."
"But it happened Nick. And as you've figured out I've known for quite some time now. It's unfortunate that this happened on this very day. The day you made your decision." She wiped her cheeks and stoop up straight. Ignoring her bleeding broken heart. He felt sick. Please no. "Just as I've known for a while, I've made my own decision. I want a divorce Nick."
"No." That's right. Stand your ground. "You're not leaving me. We can't be apart!" His voice weaved with desperation. "No."
"You keep disagreeing, and I will take the kids so far away so help me you'll never see them or me again." Her threat left him shocked. "Let's start easy. Get out."
This can not be happening. And yet it was. "No. I'm not going anywhere. Lucille I'm so sorry. Please please forgive me."
"You know what? I'll leave." Again she pushed past him and went up the stairs.
Again he followed after her. The thought and image of it: to not hold her again, to not feel her soft hair on his face when he woke up on a Sunday morning because he always woke up first, the goosebumps that welcomed him home every time he was away from her for too long, the smile she gave him, the way she hugged him and the way she kissed him. It would... was all going away. He was following her down the stairs again. Only the hand bag she came in with with her. "Lucille don't. Please. I'll do anything."
"I want a divorce." She was already at the door.
"Anything but that. I don't want to lose you. I don't want to be without you."
Holding the door nob, more than half of her ready to walk out while the other begged to stay with him, she had one more question. "Would you have told me? Breaking up whatever it was with Thelma. If I didn't know, would you have come to me and said I was cheating on you. Would you have?" She thought just maybe he would give the right answer.
"No." He stated, looking down.
And he did. But still... too bad. "I was waiting for you to tell me. For weeks I hoped you would. But all you did was pretend." Hot tears this time. Burning her eyes. All that anger had exhausted her. "You've always been good at that." Maybe one more question. "Okay. Why did you do it Nick? Was it me? Did I do something wrong?" She was calmer now. Much much calmer.
"No no. You didn't. It wasn't you."
She shifted her weight. "Then why?" He shook his head. He had no answer. She nodded. "Good bye Nick." She slammed the door on him. Meeting the other children coming back from their walk or drive or whatever. They had been back for a while but Perdita was too scared to let them go in... scared of what Lucille would do. She kissed their foreheads. "See you guys soon. Where's Marvin?" She asked Perdita.
"He- he followed the back." Will she find out? Mrs Atkins was known for... Knowing.
Lucille nodded. "Good night guys."
Under the security light, Mrs Atkins looked different than when she came in. Her hair was a mess. Her eyes red and swollen, she looked very very sad. What happened inside?
Nick banged his head against the door. She was gone. He'd ruined it. Hurt her and destroyed everything. He felt hollow. Hearing a rattle, he turned and saw Marvin glaring at him. Marvin had gone from weakened and extremely confused by all the things he'd heard to angry. He stood feet apart and fists tight. He looked ready to fight his father. Nick was more surprised that he was in the house. Which meant- "Marvin why are you-"
"What did you do?" He asked. But he didn't want an answer. Instead, he ran to his room and locked the door. Nick raked his hand through his hair as he did the same. Like a mindless zombie, he stood in the middle of the quiet, cold and empty bedroom that looked very different from what it looked like that morning... and years before.
He gave Lucille what she wanted. A divorce that ripped his heart from him. Nothing felt worse. Not having his arm cut or his fingers slammed against a door. Nothing. In fact, he would give anything for that physical pain. Lucille Atkins was no longer his wife.
