DADDYS GIRL / RYE BEAUMONT

#6

R: Zara

I ran out the room and into the downstairs bathroom. I couldn't believe it. I was having a anxiety attack.

Crying.

That's all I could do.

It's all I am ever good at.

All I can do to calm myself down during an anxiety attack is rest my head on a wall or door and ball my fists rest them next to my head.

I'd sob and sob until I'm out of tears and all that's left is the sound of my breath. Shaking in shock and emotion. I would then slide down the wall or door and curl up in a ball.

I would wish I was normal. Wish I wasn't damaged. Wish I wasn't fragile.

I did all of that. Until I was on the floor feeling worthless and ugly. Until I was ashamed of myself.

R: zara?

I didn't answer. I'm not good enough for him to talk to me. For anyone to talk to me.

R: zara it's only me sweetheart I know your probably wanting me to shut up right now.

No I didn't his voice was calming me down. I was gaining control of my breathing.

R: please I want to help. I can't let a beautiful girl like you sit in our bathroom and cry her precious tears onto the floor. Please zara let me in.

I gained the strength to stand up and open the bathroom door. He walked in and locked it
Behind him again. He then sat on the floor and pulled me next to him. I just laid in his arms and listened to his heartbeat. I had never had this sort of comfort from a boy. Not even Lewis. My own boyfriend.

R: don't be ashamed of being a little broken. Everyone is broken in there own way.
Z: are you?
R: yes ofcourse I am. I used to get bullied badly. So I changed who I was until I gave up faking myself and showed people who I really was. I am still hurt from the past and what people told me.
Z: thank you rye. I feel like I am a drama queen now though.
R: hey hey hey your not a drama queen. Andy is the biggest drama queen here.
Z: shit... the pasta.
R: don't worry Alex is finishing making it.

We then walked out and I was pulled into a group hug. It made me smile. I have only been here for a few hours and I already feel accepted by the boys.

Andy then gave me a separate hug and whispered to me.

It's a bad day not a bad life

Your right Andy.

We then had our food and all went to bed. Me and Brooklyn had a laugh and watched Netflix.