Dysfunctional (Sequel to Soft Whispers)

You're Okay

"Bri, calm down. You're okay" Ray said lightly.

I was having a bad night.

This is the second time I'm feeling like this.

I really don't want this to become a daily thing. Where I'm just feeling so sad that I don't want to breathe anymore.

"Hey, hey, look at me" Ray said.

I looked at him, he wiped the tears from my face. 

"You are okay" he said seriously. 

I wasn't.

I really wasn't.

I shook my head a little and looked down. 

I know it's hard, being depressed and feeling like you want to die. 

I know. 

I do, but please fight. 

Fight for Ray. 

Fight for Jordan. 

Fight for Jazmyne.

Fight for your mom. 

Fight for you dad. 

Fight for me. 

You can even fight for Chresanto if you want.

I nodded a little. 

Okay. 

I'll fight.

I'll try. 

I ran my hand through my hair and looked at Ray. 

I reached for my whiteboard. 

I'm going to be okay?

He nodded

"Yeah, just fine".

Okay.

"We gotta get you off Zoloft, Bri, it's not doing nothing for you". 

I nodded a little. 

Yeah, we do.

>>*<<

"She can't go to school today" I heard Ray explain. 

I was sitting on my bed and running my fingers along the cuts on my left wrist. 

"She's not feeling well" Ray stated. 

"Wait, again?" Our mom asked. 

"Yeah". 

"I'll have to find time to get her to the doctor. I can't take off today and neither can your father" she said. 

"I'll stay home". 

"You really shouldn't, I don't want both of you missing school". 

"No, it's okay. I'll get someone to swing by after school and drop off our homework". 

"Okay, fine. I'll try and get off work early". 

"Okay".

>>*<<

I was bundled up in my blankets when Ray walked into my room. 

"Hey". 

I waived. 

"Want some lunch?"

I shrugged a little. 

Sure.

I stood up and followed him downstairs to the kitchen. 

I sat on top of the island. 

"Leftovers from last night's dinner, a snack until mom or dad gets home, or we can go out and get something". 

It doesn't matter to me, I'm cool with anything.

"I feel like going somewhere".

Then fast food it is.

"I'll get my keys" he said. 

I hopped off the island and made my way to the front door. 

"So are you and Chresanto a thing?" Ray asked as he grabbed his keys and walked outside. 

Like a couple?

"Yeah". 

Oh, I don't know. 

I don't think so. 

I don't think he really likes me enough to ask me out. 

Ray chuckled, "are you kidding me? He likes you enough, trust me".

I looked at Ray as we both got in his car.

Really?

"Yeah". 

I looked out the window as he backed out of the driveway and drove down the street. 

I thought about what Shania's friends said to me the other day. 

I sighed. 

I don't know. I don't think I'm good enough for him.

"Why do you say that?" Ray questioned. 

Just... From the other girls that he use to hang out with, is all.

"Keywords: use to. He doesn't anymore". 

That still doesn't mean I'm good enough for him. 

I'm not pretty enough, and I could lose a few pounds. 

At least that's what I've been told.

"Hold on, wait a minute" Ray stated, "who told you that?" 

I looked at what I wrote and erased the last sentence. 

I didn't mean to write that. 

But you did. 

Bria, are you starting to believe what those girls are telling you?

No. 

I just...

No, I'm not.

Nobody. I had meant to write something else, sorry.

"Are you sure?" 

I nodded a little. 

Yeah, postitive.
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Sorry for any mistakes.
For all of you who have (and are currently still reading) Russian Roulette. I'm writing another Royce book and the prologue and sneak peek should be out on either Wednesday or Friday.
Love,
Me.