The Unexpected Wrong Side

Chapter 26- Removed Luck

My thoughts tell me something other than what I feel, or what I think I feel, Kyle
thought to himself.

He wasn't sure what was happening in his mind because once again, it was all over the place.

He couldn't tell if it was his mind playing tricks on him like usual.

Motions, feelings, thoughts.

They all had a title of their own.

They always seemed to repeat themselves without telling Kyle it was going to happen.

He loved Stan, or maybe he didn't.

He hated Stan, or maybe he didn't.

He wanted a relationship with Stan, maybe that was so far from being false that it felt somewhat true.

Everything was being wished to slow down and give Kyle time to breathe.

There were moments where he felt like he could take and get a full breath.

He didn't want to stay in a mental institution for the rest of his difficult problematic life.

Whatever Stan had to fix, Kyle wanted him to fix it for the sake of what they wanted to be.

A couple, a forever couple.

If Kyle had to decide everything for himself, it would be one scary life with more problems than anyone could handle.

He had someone there to guide him.

He sometimes rejected the help but that was the Schizophrenia and Psychosis talking.

Those two were always talking, putting in there opinions when they were definitely not needed in the slightest.

His chest still felt as if it were a pair of closing doors.

"Kyle?" Stan asked his name like he did when he asked him what was wrong.

"I can't...it feels like I cant breathe." Kyle finally gasped out quietly.

After many opening and closing movements of his mouth, Kyle gained a normal breathing rate back.

"Are you gonna be my boyfriend?" Kyle wondered.

"Yes. I will still care about and for you but I won't be a full-time doctor or a parent." Stan promised.

Kyle hoped that was true and that it was a genuine promise being told to his face and to his ears.

"For awhile there I thought I was losing you."

"I made mistakes that I didn't mean to make. I can't believe I hurt you. I'm so sorry, Kyle." Stan clutched onto the boy standing in front of him.

Kyle hugged back after bringing a sigh out of himself.

A sigh of relief that Stan said he was going to be his boyfriend instead of his parent or his doctor.

"Can we go eat? I'm starving." Kyle said over Stan's shoulder.

"Yeah, it's on me. What are you in the mood for?" Stan asked as they began to head towards restaurants in their small town.

Kyle thought of different types of food he would be in the mood to go for.

He didn't really care; he was just hungry.

"I'm good with burgers, if that's good with you." Kyle responded at last.

"Sure," Stan agreed, "So, why did you always come back to me?"