YOUNGBLOOD {Luke Hemmings}

chapter fourteen - monster among men🚶🏼‍♂️

Eight weeks. Eight weeks since Luke and Sophie spoke. Eight weeks since Sophie had been in L.A. Eight weeks since Luke had smiled. But that all changed in one day.

Sophie had just pulled up outside her apartment but hadn't been able to bring herself inside. She knew that she had nothing waiting for her in there except a big mess. She found it pretty fitting being as that was her life at the moment as well.

She had flown home in the morning from Spain  and decided she needed to grow up and face her problems head-on. Although she couldn't face her problems until she knew how to fix them. All she knew was that step one included going in and facing her empty apartment.

Luke had nothing to get him up every morning. He had nothing to look forward too anymore. He could no longer remember what it felt like to not be broken anymore. And he surely couldn't think of a time where he would be okay anymore. Sophie had taken his heart and walked right out of his life with it. But every time he thought about running back to her he thought about all the pain he caused her and all the tears he made her cry.

That made all his pain worth it to him, the fact that now he was only hurting himself instead of her.

He spent every day wishing that his pain was in exchange for her happiness.

After hours and hours of pondering over how to get her life together, Sophie decided it was time to start at the root of her problems, Luke.
Which is what brought her to his porch step where she was now doubting if this was the right move.

After fifteen minutes of convincing her self, she gave the door a hard knock, hoping that Luke was home.

There were a few minutes before a very run down looking Luke appeared looking insanely confused at her door. He had pajamas on, at 2 in the afternoon, his hair wasn't brushed, his eyes bloodshot, and the bags under his eyes were darker then Sophie had ever seen them before in her whole life. It was very apparent to the fact that he hadn't been doing well recently, he was also skinner than he'd ever been.

Although the second Luke saw Sophie outside his house, he smiled the biggest smile he had in a long time.

"Luke have you been eating enough?" was the first thing Sophie could say, which had her subconsciously kicking herself. She didn't want to sound like his mom, but she was horribly concerned for his health.

"Yeah, Soph. Come in. How have you been?" Luke mumbled out, embarrassingly stepping aside for her to enter his beyond messy house. Her stuff was scattered all around from when she had lived there and Luke had his stuff all on the sofa. He hadn't been able to go into their room it hurt too bad. He hadn't even left the coach.

"Good, I just got home today from a long self-care vacation. But Luke I didn't come for chitchat."

Sophie was always straight to the point which is something Luke had always admired shed never waste any time saying what she needed to say. So he just nodded to let her know he was listening.

"I think we should get back together. I personally know I'm not going to be the same without you, and you brought a joy into my life I won't be able to find elsewhere." Sophie stared into Luke's baby blue eyes waiting for a reaction.

He gave a long deep sigh before a moment of silence.

"Sophie. I promise this breaks me more then it breaks you, but sometimes when a relationship continues to hurt you again and again, eventually you have to decide whether you would be better off without it. And the stupid truth is I'm so bad for you."

Luke knew he was turning down the chance for the one thing that made him happier than anything in the whole universe, but he knew he was doing it for Sophie. He couldn't be selfish not when it came to her, no matter how bad it hurt.

"I don't understand Luke." her eyes filled up with tears confused why the boy who claimed to love her forever was turning her away.

"You're clearly just as lost and empty without me as I am with you. How can you turn me away!" she was tired and just wanted to be with him.

"I won't break your heart again; I don't wanna be a monster among men." At this point, Luke couldn't even bear to look at the short girl standing in front of him anymore. He did want her even more than she wanted him but he couldn't.

"When we were together we were fragile, always about to fall just like sand castles. It's time for me to admit that I'm an asshole. I can't keep ruining you; you'll find a new love. One that makes you happier than you ever could have thought was possible. I promise Sophie." Luke said wiping his own tears away.

"Luke, you don't understand! You make me happier than I ever thought was possible! Yeah, you've hurt me before but I've hurt you just as bad, and what's worse is we'll just be so hurt if we can't try this again!" Anger filled Sophie's voice, but it was sad anger.

"Sophie, I don't want to fight right now. We've tried to date again and again, and each time we've end up more broken than last! If not now when do we call the quits! When do we stop hurting each other." Luke was just trying to explain his logic to her when she got a better idea.

"You can't deny we both need each other."

"Soph, when it's physical, I can't keep track of days, but the emotional is more than we can take. That's why it needs to end. I wish with all my heart and soul it didn't have too, and maybe one day we'll find our way back to each other, but just not right now. If it's truly meant to be, we will find our way back when the times right." Luke honestly hoped they'd find their way back and be able to work it out.