- Noni -
" Okay...My only Rule...If you even think of going off alone...I will murder you...both of you!..." I exclaimed with a pointed look wiggling my stiff finger between both of my kids.
Jack chuckled wrapping an arm around my waist once he sat the blanket and everything down for us.
" Let them have fun babe" he said softly at a tone only i could have possibly heard leaving a soft kiss on my shoulder.
" Sophie please watch Jaden" I said giving sophia a serious look.
She looked down at her feet like she was upset but nodded following her small brother down to the water.
I raised my eyebrow watching them for a minute but just sat down laying beside my husband
and 3 beach bags.
" What was that?" Jack asked frowning.
" She's growing up...It's probably just hormones..." i said but even I was worrying about her change of mood.
She was happy to get out of same old California.
Her words not mine
" Hormones?!...No...she's like 4!" Jack frowned sitting up looking down at me.
" She's not four anymore Jack...She's about to be 11...She's gonna start her perio-"
" Gah!...I do NOT!...I can't deal with you around that time...she's not doing that stuff..."
This guy
" It's not like we really have a choice Jack...She's becomin a woman....soon she's gonna start dat-"
" Thats where we draw the line!...I will not allow her to date any little boys at the california school...we're homeschooling her as soon as she gets out of the 8th grade..." he cut me off once again shaking his cute little head.
" You're so lame...She's gonna have to grow up and who knows...she might start dating in 8th grade"
" We're taking her out as soon as school statt back up again" he sat up staring straight ahead watching the kids...mostly Sophia's closely.
" You're such a buzz kill babe...let her have her fun...she's pretty responsible for a 10 year old..." i said sitting up as well to pull my cover up off.
" i'm not a buzz kill...You have some nerve...you won't even let Jaden have a play date with a little girl" Jack looked back crossing his arms.
I widen my eyes.
" Jaden is my little boy...he doesn't need a girlfriend..."
" What about when he goes to high school huh? He looks just like me so you know he's gonna have girls all over him..." He chuckled. I scoffed pushing his shoulder.
" Jaden will not be aloud to have a girlfriend...i am the only woman he will ever need to love" i spat tilting my head up to the sky.
" Lameeeee...My boy is gonna get all the ladies...Just like his dad" He smirked
I frowned looking away to avoid from that conversation but as always it follows me everywhere.
" You know what i meant baby...I-"
" I know...Jack" i said looking down at my fingers " It just hurts...she knows how she can get you back no matter what...No matter what she...she'll always be in your life now...and whenever you're alone...Theres nothing I can do but hope...hope that you won't break my heart again..."
My voice became a bit hoarse towards the end, tears were welling up in my eyes...
Jack stayed quiet because he knows it's true...Theres no ignoring her now that they have a kid with each other...
" Daddy! Daddy Look!!" Jaden ran up at full speed smiling " Mommy what's wrong?" he frowned stopping once he seen me crying.
"Nothing baby...mommy's fine" I weakly smiled wiping my wet cheeks and nose.
Mommy's just fine...
" Are you sure?" he asked pouting and i nodded blowing him a kiss. " Ok...Dad look!"he yelled grabbing Jacks hand pulling him off passing Sophia.
" mom" She frowned laying her head on my shoulder. " How did you know when you liked dad and dad liked you?" she asked softly.
" Uhm When he comforted me over an ex boyfriend...we kissed in my room and then laughed about it seconds after...He told me i was stupid for thinking nobody could love me..." i smiled to myself remembering the moment.
" Oh...What about when he said he loved you? Did he mean it?" she asked looking up at me.
" Well uhm...It was quick but i would hope so..." i lightly chuckled playing in his hair.
" Then why does he keep hurting us?...If he loves us...Then he should stop right?...You cry almost every day...doesn't he see that?...When you cry i get upset...i-I told him that...But he still hurt you" she frowned.
I looked over at her confused.
" Didn't you guys just become fine again?...He told you he was sorry"
" He's lying...When he said he loves you i could tell...When he said he loves Jaden his eyes sparkle but when he says he loves me...there's nothing...He doesn't love me anymore...He loves Ryann more" she said crossing her arms over her chest.
" Sophia!...Your father loves you so much...It may not feel like it but he loves you very much...He may love Ryann as well but that doesn't mean he doe-"
" I'm the mistake not her...I don't even know why he's still here..." She mumbled crying
I pulled her to my chest deciding to contonue the conversation later on...Somethings wrong and this is not the right place to speak on it.
+
I sighed tossing my hair towel onto the chair across the room.
Jack and i haven't said a word since we got
home...neither has Sophia...She only talked to Jaden during dinner but it was small one word answers.
Jack bit his lip looking away from his phone.
" What was goin on when Jaden and i ran away?...I saw Sophia crying" He finally spoke watching my steal one of his teeshirts.
I bit my lip sliding in bed beside him.
" Sophia feels like you don't love her anymore" i just spat out pulling my hair up into two little space buns. " Like you love Ryann...more than you love her now" i finished glancing at him.
" What?!...Thats bullshit!...I love both of them equally" he snapped furrowing his eyebrows.
" Why're you telling me this Jack?...Tell that to Sophia...Your daughter" I said softly.
Frankly i was tired of being this dysfunctional family...My 10 year old daughter believes her father stopped loving her...what kind of bullshit is that?!...
" I love you Tori...Y-You know that right?" he stammered gulping. " I don't...I can't lose you" he stammered letting his voice crack.
I looked down at my lap but nodded.
" I-I know...I love you too" I truthfully told him
But was his I love you true?...
