NOSE BLEED //:A BTS fan fiction

Talk

We stay like this for a while until the door opens and the boys come in with the large laundry basket and a bunch of towels

I tell them to wrap the bodies in the sheets and put them in the laundry basket, felix and I begin to clean

Once we are done, I check my watch to see that it's already 6am

"we don't have time to move the body's so just meet here again at 1 am" I suggest as I stand up

I look down to see that my sweater is covered in blood, Jin notices and takes of his jacket

He helps me put it on and zips it up

My heart rate is through the roof, my palms are sweaty and I have butterflies

A feeling I never thought I'd have again, I haven't felt like this with V yet

Maybe I'm just being an idiot and just think I like him because I feel bad that he likes me and I like someone else

It can't be that, when I'm around Jin I have the basic feelings of what a crush feels like, it's exciting but when I'm around V he just makes me have a sense of pease and happiness, it's different and I like it

Maybe it's just in a friendly way, but something just tells me it isn't

The rest of the boys obviously make me feel both, they can make me flustered within minutes but they also give me a sense of peace and happiness

I thank Jin and close my eyes for the second

Jungkook comes to my side and hooks his arms with mine as we walk down the corridor, we enter the dining room to be met with the usual stares and whispers

I can't spot anyone from the opposite group, they must be out looking for the ones we just disposed of

We sit down and make small talk until someone taps me on the shoulder, I turn around to see Mrs Hill with a soft expression on her face, I really want to know why she's being so nice all of a sudden

"can I talk to you, alone?" she bends down and whispers

The boys, apart from felix and jimin, look at me with a worried expression

I just and and stand up, I just do a half nod and follow Mrs Hill to an office not to far

She opens the door and tells me to sit

"how are you holding up?" she asks softly and sits down next to me

"uhm well I'm not as weak as I was an------"

"I mean emotionally, being so young and losing a baby does take its toll" she says as she brings her hand to her chin

I can't open up to her, I can't give her my weakness

She notices my hesitation and sighs a little

"I know that you are confused as to why I'm being so nice all of a sudden but I know what it's like to loose a baby, I wouldn't even wish it on my worst enemy" she says as she looks to the floor

I guess she has also been through this

I sigh a little, maybe I should talk, just once

"I don't know how I'm holding up, I think I just keep avoiding it but every time I look at him I..... I just feel so guilty" tears begin to fall onto my cheeks

She lightly rubs my arm and nods

"you haven't told the boy have you?" she asks lightly

I shake my head as I wipe the tears away, my eyes begin to glow a mix of green and orange

I just feel so empty

I can't believe I would be so careless of this sort of stuff

"everyone deals with this stuff differently but boys tend to keep themselves to themselves so when you do tell him, he is going to need you to be there, trust me it becomes easier when you have each other" she comes a little closer

She wraps an arm around me and I lean into her

I just need to talk to someone I don't know, maybe I will feel better

"I just don't know how to, he's not my boyfriend or anything, it was just a one off thing" I pull away a little

Her face softens

"I'm not going to lie, that makes it so much more difficult but when you tell him it will bring you closer together"

I sob a little more until she looks at her watch

I can barely talk or even walk for that matter, I think it has fully hit me now

Im just so dumb and careless, I've not only hurt myself but I've hurt V to

I don't think he will even want to talk to me after it

Mrs Hill gives me a little more advice on how to tell him and sends me on my way

I look at my watch to see its 7:30am

Im 30 minutes late to training but they will understand, they can just ask Mrs Hill

I slowly walk to the training room, trying my best to look normal

I take a deep breath before walking in, I look to see that Ara has a very flustered and annoyed looking Jin pinned to the floor

"ah the boys told me, you should maybe sit this one out" she says and points to a chair in the corner

The boys look at me worried but they can't do anything unless they want to be punished

"are you okay?" V mouth shapes to me

I can't even look at him. I look down and just nod

I bring my legs up to my chest and wrap my arms around them, sinking more into Jins jacket

I let a few tears fall silently as I watch then practice, they are laughing and joking with each other but they all keep glancing at me with worried looks

The whole time I'm staring at Jin and Ara, she's very touchy and clingy. Jin looks very uncomfortable but he keeps doing what she says anyway

Its confusing the hell out of me but is also making me kind of jealous, I'm holding back my eye colours and it's starting to hurt a little

He knows that I like him so what's the point in trying to hide it anymore

I glance at V to see that his eyes are a mix of blue, orange and red. I can tell he's being a little rough with jungkook

Jungkook stops him for a second and they talk and the red disappears, they hug and begin training again

I wonder what was going on, I know I could have listened but I want to give them their privacy

Practice finishes and the boys bid their good byes

Jimin, felix and I make our way to the lookout and sit back in my chair

They both make small talk, avoiding the topic of why Mrs Hill wanted to talk

I just sit there staring into the distance, I watch as a few zombies pass by and as the boys let a few people out and back in

"hana?" someone taps my shoulder lightly

I snap out of my thoughts and turn to jimin

"our shift is over" he says lightly

What?

I look at my watch to see that it's 2pm, I just nod and follow them to the dining room. I sit down and we wait for the rest of the boys to get here

They join us and I just sit there staring in to space, I glance at V to see that he's already staring at me, his eyes are bright orange

I need to tell him now

I close my eyes and take a deep breath

"can I talk to you for a second?"