365 Days (ziam fanfiction)

Day 167

Day 167

Time 509 am

I am awoken by harry leaving my side and going to his room. I lay there until he makes it to his room and then I sit up. I feel my arms are itching to be cut and I really wanna puke. I have a feeling we will never talk about this again which leaves me extremely disappointed. I stand up and I look around, suddenly anxious to hurt myself. I go to the kitchen and go to the top cabinet, the one I never go to and a bunch of supplies for the bathroom hides there. including razors. I take one and walk to my room quietly. I turn on the shower and step in. I take the razor and set it on my skin, not caring even a little bit what it does to harry. I slit it across my skin slowly then I do it faster and faster with each cut and the last cut is on my wrist and its the deepest. blood pours out just like that day and so does the pain. water drowns out the water to a brownish color and I start to relax as I lay there. this wasn't on purpose this time it really wasn't but once it happened I let it. I let out a small breath as I feel myself start to fade rather quickly.

410pm

I awake in a hospital bed tubes everywhere harry sits on the cot. the other boys no where insight. I start to cry at another failed attempt to die. fucking harry. just let me die already. harry senses I'm awake somehow and wakes up. their are bags under his eyes and he looks exhausted and worn out. I stare at him and realize just how happy he'd be without me. the boys abandoned me it feels like they never visit the only real person who's here is Harry. and he's drowning in my sorrow. I'm so sorry harry. I broke you too. I'm so sorry.

I stare at him and don't realize I started crying again until he wipes my tears. I stare at him suddenly embarrassed and angry. "if you didn't like me. you shouldn't of kissed me back." he stares at me and smiles "liam... I love you so much."  he grabs my face and kisses me and I kiss him back although I am still crying. he pulls away and wipes my tears. "sing to me harry." he nods as he climbs into bed gathers me in his arms I sob as he begins:

"Isn't she lovely

Isn't she wonderful

Isn't she precious

Less than one minute old

I never thought through love we'd be

Making one as lovely as she

But isn't she lovely made from love

I smile as I start to calm down a little. no longer crying...

Isn't she pretty

Truly the angel's best

Boy, I'm so happy

We have been heaven blessed

I can't believe what God has done

Through us he's given life to one

But isn't she lovely made from love

his voice pours through me like a medicine and I start to fall asleep to it like a lullaby...

Isn't she lovely

Life and love are the same

Life is Aisha

The meaning of her name

Londie, it could have not been done

Without you who conceived the one

That's so very lovely made from love"

by the end of the song I am asleep in his arms...