This Is How I Disappear (Negan/OFC)

Chapter 8

"Ung. Ah!" Chuck wakes up to a searing pain in her left side.

Oh god! What's happening?! What's wrong with me?! I need Negan.

"Doc! She's awake!" Negan calls out as he jumps up from the chair beside Chuck's bed and leans over her. "Hey, baby girl," he says gently as he strokes her hair.

"Negan? Ung!" Chuck croaks out as her face contorts in pain.

"Give her something, doc! She's in fuckin' pain!"

"Charlotte?" Carson says from the other side of the bed. "I'm going to give you some medicine now. You'll probably get a bit drowsy," Carson readies a syringe and injects it into Chuck's IV.

"I'm hurt... Negan?" Tears stream from Chuck's eyes as she waits for the medicine to take effect.

"I'm here, baby girl." Negan's gentle words echo in Chuck's ears and she drifts off into unconsciousness.

Chuck wakes up some time later to a dimly lit room. She still feels the effects of whatever medicine is in her system, but it's faded enough that she can keep her eyes open and her pain is still manageable. She turns her head to the right to see Negan sleeping uncomfortably, half in a chair beside the bed and half on her mattress. His head is right beside hers, close enough that she can feel his breath on her face. She stretches her right arm out slowly and lightly touches Negan's cheek with the back of her fingers, enjoying the feel of his facial hair. He takes in a sharp breath and lifts his head up quickly.

"Chuck?" he whispers. "Do you need the doctor?"

"No. I don't think so."

"You're in the infirmary."

"I see that." She chuckles slightly at his obvious statement.

"Do you remember what happened?"

"Yeah. I think so. Two men... -the man who was in here and his friend- attacked me and stole medicine. Did you catch them?" She looks at Negan meekly.

"Yeah. We got them and we got the fuckin' drugs back, too."

"Good. I'm sorry I couldn't stop them-"

"Don't fuckin' do that. Don't blame yourself. You didn't do anything wrong."

"Okay." Her voice cracks as tears well up in her eyes. She doesn't want to cry in front of Negan, but she can't really control her emotions at the moment.

"It's okay." Negan hugs her as much as he can from their positions. "I'm sorry I didn't protect you, baby girl."

"No. It's not your fault, Negan," she says as he pulls away from her. She moves her left arm to caress his cheek. "Ah!" She cries out as pain shoots through her left side at the movement.

"Careful! Don't pull your fucking stitches."

"They... stabbed me?"

"Yeah. You almost fuckin' bled out. I had to give you some of my blood. So you got fuckin' high octane shit running through your veins, now."

She laughs, but it causes her pain. "Ouch! Don't make me laugh."

He smiles at her for several moments, but his face turns sour as if a bad thought comes into his mind. "I need you outta this fuckin' bed," he says as he puts his head down, his breathing heavy.

"What do you mean, Negan? Are you okay?"

"It's just... fuck." He rakes a hand through his hair and scratches his neck. "Lucille. She was in and out of the fucking hospital for months before the end. Tests. Treatments... I stayed with her during it all. Saw her wither away to nothing in a fucking hospital bed. This shit... Seeing you like this is, uh... bringing back some bad fucking memories."