Grumpy (Suga x F Reader Hybrid AU)

Good Job, Yeonglihan

Prompt from SpaceNovak, aka a King™, on AO3

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Well, this was just great. Absolutely fan-fucking-tastic. Probably the best day of your life, by far.

Sure, mice were adorable. You might have gotten one for a pet if you didn't have a cat hybrid (though you were optimistic to a fault, you weren't an idiot). But right now, they were horrific. The bane of your existence.

Yeonglihan pranced into the bedroom with her head held high in cocky pride, carrying a toy in her mouth. You were busy editing some forms for work, and Yoongi was busy mixing for his album, so neither of you really paid attention to what she was doing as she hopped up on the bed. You did, however, offer her a half-hearted stroke along her back, which she arched into appreciatively. Satisfied with her human, she then turned to her hybrid, and he patted her head with a distracted smile.

This would not do. Yeonglihan just did something amazing, incredible, and her parents weren't even paying attention! How rude. So, she did what any intelligent kitten - which she obviously was - in need of some praise would do. She dropped the gift she'd been carrying in her mouth, right on your thigh.

Except it wasn't a toy.

With a shriek, you threw the limp mouse carcass off your leg, a shudder running up your spine. Yeonglihan darted into Yoongi's arms at the sudden noise, both of their ears flattening, and Yoongi took out his earbuds and snapped, "What the fuck, Y/N?"

Your knees pulled to your chest, work forgotten, you cried, "Yeonglihan caught a fucking mouse!"

Yoongi froze at that, cocking his head first at you, then at Yeonglihan, and then at the tiny body on the floor.

God, you hated killing anything, even rodents or bugs. But you really hated having mice - wild mice - in your apartment. But you couldn't get traps or poison, those were cruel! You'd have to go get some of those live traps, the sticky ones that you put peanut butter on. Yeah, that'd do the trick.

But what to do about this poor little thing? You'd have to have a proper funeral. That's the only way -

"Good job, Yeonglihan!" Yoongi suddenly crooned, his voice almost loud in his excitement. He turned to you, eyes alight, "Our baby caught something! Quick, get a picture of it! No wait, that's lame. Fuck that. But we have to have memories, what a good -"

"Yoongi!" You cried, hardly believing your ears. "What the hell? She just killed it!"

"My little hunter!" Yoongi continued, hardly paying any attention.

"Yoongi." He finally offered you a glance, and you groaned, "That's disgusting. Don't let her do that."

Yoongi harrumphed, turning back to the haughty kitten in his lap. "Well, I think it's awesome. Mommy might think it's gross, but I'm very proud of you, Yeonglihan."

You blinked at the pair incredulously, not knowing what to say. The kitten seemed to be shooting you arrogant glares, as if to say, Ha! Take that!

Shaking your head in disbelief, you said, "Would you please just go flush it or something? At least get it out of our room."

Yoongi snorted, moving his laptop aside and swinging his legs over the bed. "Fine, I'll just let her play with it in the living room."

You looked back down at your laptop, not yet registering what he just said. The hybrid hopped up, letting Yeonglihan jump out of his arms to grab her kill, and then began to make his way out the door, tail waving back and forth in pride. Ugh, you couldn't believe him sometimes.

Wait.

"Yoongi!" You shouted, scrambling to your feet. "Absolutely not!"

Before really thinking it through, you snatched the carcass from Yeonglihan's mouth, earning an indignant meow. And then realized what you were holding, and zipped to the bathroom as fast as possible, practically dry-heaving in your disgust.

"Y/N!" Yoongi yelled, irritation thick in his voice. "That's not yours!"

Right, because it was Yeonglihan's. Got it.

"It's a dead mouse!" You shouted back, already holding the mouse over the toilet. Goodbye, little one. So sorry my cat murdered you.

"It's Yeonglihan's dead mouse!" He retorted, rounding the corner to the bathroom.

But the deed was done. The mouse was in the toilet bowl, never to be seen again.

Yoongi blinked at you, as if he wasn't quite sure how to react. You hadn't flushed the toilet yet, so he glanced down into the bowl and then grumbled, "You're an ass."

"It. Is. A. Dead. Mouse."

With that, you pushed down the lever, and Yoongi shook his head in disappointment.

"You're the worst cat mom ever."

You shrugged, making your way past him. "I'm going to go buy some live traps. Do not let her kill another mouse if you see one."

Though still huffing, Yoongi released a begrudging "fine." Yeonglihan had made her way to the bathroom too, and she was scowling at you. Unless, of course, that was your imagination, but you doubted it. You crouched down to pick her up, scolding, "We don't kill things, Yeonglihan. That's not nice."

Yoongi rolled his eyes. "She's a hunter, Y/N. You should be proud of her."

You didn't bother replying, instead opting to make your way to the sink to wash your hands with the hottest water possible.

God, what were you going to do with those two?

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K but this was hilarious to write. Also, thank you all so, so much for 20k reads. I never thought I'd get that many on anything I wrote, it feels so surreal. Thank you all! 💜💜💜

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